Consider that ten to 11 percent unemployment still means about 90 percent employment. Now imagine that unemployment is down to three percent. Did that change the perception of your own market value, even for a second?

Regardless of macro conditions, this is still your career - not your boss's, the company's or anyone else's. When you remember that, you'll begin to realize your own intrinsic value. It helps you to become more confident in your job, appreciate your self-worth, and helps you mitigate stress. This is not to downplay the difficulty of today's office environment. But it's easy to be engulfed by thinking that we're at the complete mercy of those around us in stressful times. Yet our only limit is really ourselves.

Manage Up by "Parenting"

Putting your career destiny back into your own hands involves more than just changing your outlook. One of the most empowering tools is to become the "parent" in the office, minus the patronizing. You read correctly!

If your boss exhibits bad or childish behavior, whether it's of the "bratty" or the "little lost lamb" variety I talk about, then you may need to take charge. It's time to diplomatically set boundaries and model more calm, measured, "adult" behavior.

It seems easy, but many employees are understandably afraid to do it in this business climate - because it take some finely-tuned skills. Ironically, taking command when a boss is overwhelmed or even angry is something bosses appreciate. When bosses "act out," it's often because of their own issues of fear, lack of control or acceptance. They appreciate having the "voice of reason" and a valuable sounding board, despite their position of authority.

Of course, if your manager slips into the unchangable behavioral mode, i.e., there's no antidote for your toxic dynamic in your office, you will need to look for greener pastures.

There are other fringe benefits to championing the ownership of this being YOUR career. If you're currently unemployed, you'll realize that you still have unique talents and skills, as you continue your job search with confidence. Your great credentials are yours to take wherever you go.

Take What Other Say, Then Distill

While your confidantes may urge you to "sit quietly" and make no changes whatsoever in a difficult environment, be careful about letting others completely guide your path. You could find yourself permanently on a dead end. It may be hard to reprogram yourself. But when you really make your happiness your priority - versus the status quo - it's extremely empowering.

Got skills? Only you know the finer details of your job duties. Beyond your technical expertise, you understand office processes, dynamics and lingo. You know how to get things done. These skills are transferable - and valuable.

You Are What You Project

Understand the depth of your expertise and internalize it. When you do, you'll develop an unmistakable confidence and assertiveness that everyone can see...even the most difficult bosses.

Be the role model. In Tame Your Terrible Office Tyrant (TOT), I quote Mahatma Ghandi: "We must become the change we want to see." Understand your real, objective value to your organization, and that will give you confidence. It also helps you set boundaries with a demanding or self-centered boss.

Own your career choices. Is a tough economy the right time to be diplomatically assertive and display self confidence...redefining your mindset? Can you be the proverbial parent - with patronizing - when you face a challenging boss? The answers to the above are: "Absolutely." Your new attitude will help, not hinder you.

Remember, despite today's temporary employment conditions, you have hard-won, unique skills. This is your life. This is YOUR career!