Stepmonster

Reaching to the core of the stepmother experience.
Wednesday Martin, Ph.D., is the author of the book Stepmonster. See full bio

Stepfamily Holidays: Serving Up "Togetherness," Passing on the Drama

How can stepmothers avoid stepmartyr syndrome this holiday season?


Give yourself a minute (okay, twenty) to listen to this podcast especially for women with stepkids at holiday time. In it I chat with Jacque Fletcher, author of A Career Girl's Guide to Becoming a Stepmom.

As the culturally-designated "blending" agents of the stepfamily, stepmothers face special stressors during the holiday season. You might be expected to do the holidays with your husband or partner's ex "for the kids' sake." You and your partner might argue about finances--whether to pay for young adult step/kids' travel, how much to spend on gifts. For men and women who are stepparents, the holidays can be awkward if you mother-in-law and father-in-law are still close to your spouse's ex. And many men and women who are stepparents report feeling like "outsiders" at holiday time, or being polarized by parenting the step/kids right when everyone is "supposed" to feel happy and close. But there are plenty of ways to make it easier. Have a listen:

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