Somebodies and Nobodies

Dignity for all.

Must Love Wilt and Die?

A vignette

Love either evolves or it morphs into memorabilia. When the romance fades, we may conclude that love has ended. Not so. Love has many faces.

If we follow love’s lead into deeper waters, it acquires the power to remake us. Marriage is love’s crucible, possessing the tensile strength to contain the heat of self-transformation. In “sparring” with our partners, we root out the false in one another. Presently, a subtly altered person is filling our shoes. Instead of ossifying into habit, the relationship is recharged.

Sometimes love completes itself. Achieving a blameless understanding of a break-up may take years, but it’s a high-return investment in the rest of your life. As we understand how ex-partners served our development, they may come to feel like dear friends.

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Robert W. Fuller, Ph.D., former president of Oberlin College, is an authority on rankism and dignity.


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