Shameless Woman

One of several excellent posts of late. I'm willing to bet that many of your ex-friends read this blog with envy. In the female realm it seems that anything is ok as long as it's done for love. As soon as the motivation becomes something that doesn't fit the accepted definition of love, harsh judgements are made. Smart women like yourself are poking huge holes the the many bogus beliefs poeple have about sex. And as you said, they're falling into pieces over it. As a guy who grew up in the 70's and 80's I am kind of puzzled why we haven't got past this yet. Then again, I'm interested in a new book called "Sex and Punishment: Four Thousand Years of Judging Desire". Maybe we need a little more time. Thanks for being a trailblazer. Maybe the silent majority can start speaking up now.

The people who practice BDSM say the same thing as you. But the hero and heroine in 50 shades - both embrace it -in the end- in the very sense that you advocate. But together they get rid of it as an expression of his abuse - his need to damage others in a non consensual way?

I haven't read the Roiphe article yet, but I applaud your openness about a subject that we should be talking about--honestly and with admiration. I can't understand how we as a culture still don't acknowledge a woman's sexuality. I write openly about sexuality in one of my blogs from an educational point of view. And, I'm comfortable saying that as a single 57 year old woman I enjoy and seek sex. With a past lover I had the chance to explore and expand my sexual world and I'm still discovering what turns me on.
Thank you.