Sex & Sociability

Question and commentary on connections, both sexual and social

Starting Again After A Sexual Lull

Getting back into the sexual groove after a time apart can be a problem rather than a joyous natural event. Read More

more than a lull

A good topic, in which I see a lot of myself. Especially referencing how sexual initiation used to be "automatic" without understanding how it happened, so that now I no longer know how to ask for it. You must see this frequently, because it doesn't appear to be the first time you've blogged this message.

Any additional thoughts you would add when it is more than a lull? Our marriage has been sexless for years and I'm just not sure how best to get and keep the conversation going.

Starting the conversation

I urge you to be bold and simply tell her that a sexless marriage is no longer tolerable. Make an appointment with a sex therapist and if she won't accompany you, go alone. I have often said that the dynamics within a reltionship seldom change unless you take charge of changing them. Best wishes.

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Isadora AlmanM.F.T., is a Board-certified sex, marriage, and family therapist, lecturer, author, and syndicated advice columnist of "Ask Isadora."

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