Sex Life of the American Male

How new technology, new mores, and current events impact male sexuality.

Male Sexual Fantasies and Masturbation

Research concludes there are gender-based difference in the masturbatory fantasies of males in comparison to females. Read More

heterosexual men wanting to be penetrated fantasy

This is very common, guys wanting to be probed by a vibrator or a dildo. A fantasy trend among middle-aged hetero males.

Whuh?

Where did you see that, in the issue of AARP Magazine with Brad Pitt on the cover?

A weirdly common one is guys

A weirdly common one is guys who want to do it 'gang bang' style with their buddies - basically having sex with each other vicariously via the body of some poor, unfortunate woman.

Group sex as male bonding.

Group sex as male bonding. It's kind of disturbing.

Oh, and lets not forget the

Oh, and lets not forget the whole 'hot twins' thing. Men getting off on incest. Good lawd, what next?

Fantasies

I engage in coaching for men who seek to address issues related to their sexuality. I only coach men 40 years or older because it is in this 'transition' or mid-life time of life when men have a history they can reflect upon and are more often than not ready or willing to explore what is working, what is not working, what they want in their lives to be authentic and true to themselves. I coach men who identify as gay, straight, bi, trans, married, partnered, single, polyamorous.

Fantasies play a major role in my coaching. Men have discussed with me their antasies around taboo subjects, kinky sex, homoerotic scenes, beastiality, gang-bangs, cannabilism, etc. Fantasies that may or may not be ever played out or lived in real time. But, they find in my coaching a safe space to explore the meaning of such fantasies, as well as the needs these fantasies are meeting in their lives. It is because most do not want to talk it out with a therapist or in any other 'public' fashion that men come to me.

Fantasies speak volumes about what a man needs in his sex life. He may or may not be able to find that need met in vanilla sex or even with the sex he has with his partner/lover/wife. This also speaks volumes about how puritanical our culture remains around sexual issues, and how much men are still limited in trying to fit gender roles assigned to them by parents, peers, and media.

We have a long way yet to go when men can talk with each other, or even with their sexual partners, about their fantasies without being shamed or made to feel guilty about even having such fantasies.

Maybe true for some, but not all

"We have a long way yet to go when men can talk with each other, or even with their sexual partners, about their fantasies without being shamed or made to feel guilty about even having such fantasies."

Maybe true for many, but certainly not all men. I can talk about anything sexual with anyone and feel no shame whatsoever. My only concern is making others uncomfortable.

Male group sex

There is nothing like the ultra masculine feeling of bowing your legs and jacking off with another guy..make us feel like MEN! We do it at my meetings twice monthly .http://www.daburghjacks.com/home.html

Male Sexuality

Check out my blog on male sexuality! Comments, suggestions, critiques are most welcome. www.transitionpower.com/blog

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Michael Shelton is a writer, therapist, and educator focused on male sex and sexuality issues.

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