Science Of Small Talk

I'm a college student currently, and experience the cyber age in a way that is diametrically opposed to some of the ways discussed in this article.

For instance, while some students do use e-mail carelessly, I find it to be infinitely more stressful to write an e-mail to a professor, lest it be misconstrued. The absense of tone of voice and facial expression in e-mail (and any form of online communication, really) makes it a much more delicate endeavor. Eg: try the phrase, "I don't care." Is it rude? Is it flippant? What if it's in response to, "When would you like to meet?" Maybe then it's neither of the two-maybe it's an attempt at deferential flexibility.

When what we're saying is distilled to only words, I find that what we mean usually gets lost. This isn't limited to teacher-student interactions. I experience this same problem with friends and have a number of friends who experience this with romantic partners (though I, for one, refuse to connect romantically through this haphazard excuse for communication).

I think in a lot of ways, the typo-ridden/overly casual e-mails you receive might be getting lost in translation as well. Cyber communication on the whole doesn't demand correct punctuation, spelling, or grammar. For this reason, I'd guess it's probable that the students who send you e-mails full of mistakes don't see this as disrespect. What they mean is probably just getting lost in how they say it.

It's Spring Break in Pennsylvania and I am amazed at the number of students that have emailed me over break with questions on upcoming assignments, including a few, "will you look this over for me and get back to me so I can have it ready to submit on Monday." Shocked~ I have regular office hours, I have a "course logistic" discussion forum on Blackboard, I open class by asking students if they have any questions on upcoming assignments...nothing except emails from students that have procrastinated on their work and now want me to personally walk them through their assignments. I am frustrated with students that expect me to be available to them 24/7. My response, an out of office reply...I am unavailable until after break and that they can meet me during my office hours.

Maybe it didn't used to be like this- but aren't office hours supposed to be times that the Professor was there in the office, and you could drop by with questions? Sometimes professors will indicate that they want you to confirm beforehand, which makes sense, but for the most part I think they are treated as "drop-in hours"...

I've also believed email to be the preferred mode of communication- better than dropping in. That way the professor can answer the question when it's convenient.

I also find that the tone I receive back from professor is mixed. Often there is no salutation, just a couple words response. It makes me feel, as the student, like I was wasting their time (even though I make sure before I send the email that it's something I clearly need help on). So the miscommunication can definitely go both ways.