I had a dream
But it turned to dust
What I thought was love
That must have been lust"
A new study from the Journal of Sexual Medicine that analyzed 20 studies on the effects of sex and love on the body found that two parts of the brain, the insula and the stratium, are key in the way that desire develops into love. The study concluded that lust is triggered in the part of the brain that controls pleasureable feelings such as sex and food, while feelings of love are activated in another part of the brain that controls habitual behavior over time. Concordia Psychology Professor Jim Pfaus, lead author in the study, noted that "the change from desire to love is the bonding mechanism in relationships."
We see this physiological pattern in mirage relationships. Men use physical attraction and charm to begin a relationship.To keep the momentum of the incipient romance going, they use approval seeking to create the illusion that the couple shares so many tastes, views and goals together. Thus the relationship moves from lust to a feeling of love of the whole person. For the romantic, it is written in the stars, and for the religious it is God's Will that the two lovers have found each other. At this point, commitment is made to either become engaged and wed or cohabitate. This is the honeymoon stage, when the bonded couple experiences weeks or even months of bliss. To the lovers, the relationship will always be one of true, unconditional love. Best-selling author Dr. Harville Hendrix describes this brief interlude as a time for couples "when fears are held at bay...and romantic love is going to heal them and make them whole."