Repairing Relationships

Building Intimacy and Joy into Your Relationships

Players and Taylor Swift

Beware of the Player!

"Players" are a dangerous type of mirage man because they understand what buttons to push on women to fool them into thinking there is a real relationship happening. They are experts at conjuring up a spirit of artificial intimacy and use approval seeking to keep the illusion from fading away.

A classic example of women getting "played" is country music singer Taylor Swift. Taylor, 21, fell hard for "Love and Other Drugs" star Jake Gyllenhaal, 30, last October. Jake initiated their first date through his handlers, spending the day apple picking in upstate New York and then heading back to Manhattan for a taping of "Saturday Night Live". Sources said they warned Taylor not to move so fast with this but she didn't listen. The twitterpated lovers next spent a romantic vacation in Big Sur, California. In mid-November Jake spent $150,000 for a private jet to fly Taylor out to England to be with him while he promoted his new movie. For Thanksgiving the smitten couple visited Jake's actress sister Maggie in a traditional sign of "Meet the Family" commitment. 

Jake had dated some on Hollywood's most famous actresses including Reese Witherspoon and Kirsten Dunst. He grabbed headlines when he confessed he had engaged in casual sex but said those days were behind him now...

The honeymoon didn't last long for this "Player". Jake shocked Taylor and millions of adoring fans by ending the romance over the phone(!) over New Years, saying he "wasn't feeling it anymore."  Mirage men stop "feeling it" after the honeymoon stage of Mirage Man Syndrome. Sources closed to the heart-broken Taylor called it "a 180-degree turn and so out of the blue". Ladies, beware of the "Player"! 



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J.R. Bruns, M.D., is co-author of The Tiger Woods Syndrome, a book about repairing relationships.

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