Real Women

Creating success in work and life, on our own terms

3 Keys to Finding Your Purpose

3 keys to finding your purpose. Read More

Great Insight

I like the part about sometimes kidding ourselves that our calling can be embraced without challenges. It's tough to make real what you feel you can do for the rest of your life. It is so real to me. Thanks a lot for this piece.

Your welcome

Thanks for your comments Eric, I am pleased the piece resonated.

no shortcuts...

It's nice to see the word "purpose" instead of "passion". I always thought the phrase "finding your passion" was as ambiguous as it is innocuous. Goals without real sacrifice are transitory at best, and one of the unfortunate mixed messages in today's mainstream culture is that it's possible to let something go after a short time if it isn't working out as a goal. But the devil is in the details, and a successful game plan and realistic measured expectations are more likely to lead to a successful outcome of any endeavor.

Thank you.

Thank you.

Very nicely written....gave

Very nicely written....gave me the required boost.....thank you.


I followed my calling rather than finishing college. I have illustrated 1000's of pieces and I have made a little more than minimum wage. I have self-published and have about 400 regular followers which adds up to about 600 bucks a month for 200 hours of work.
Had I finished college I would be making 30 to 40k a year in my area. Instead, I wait tables 20 hours a week and make about 10k a year on that, plus my art. I live in a 200 square foot shop building that I bought from a local dealer for 80 bucks a month until paid and I pay 40 bucks a month to rent the end of the asphalt drive and about a 30x40 foot lot. I wired the building and keep a fridge and cpu and internet and I plumbed in a sink and commode and shower with a 30 gallon reservoir in the loft that gives plenty of pressure. I wash my clothes in the Dawn in sink. I grow a garden and can vegetables to save money. But hey, I answered my calling.

So are you glad you followed

So are you glad you followed your calling or do you regret not going to college and getting a regular $40k a year job?

Thank you for sharing your

Thank you for sharing your story! Do you feel you made the right choice? Are you happy with that choice?

Don't know how to start.. but need to

I've had great ideas over and over through the years..Businesses, inventions, games... I share them with family, sometimes friends. They tell me how great they are and how I should "do it!" or "make it!". Then, the ideas, they die. I don't have a college education. I am married to a man without a college education. I have 4 kids and I work part-time doing nothing I want to be doing. Just like the, literally, 40 some jobs I've had since I was 15. But it's getting worse now.. I have zero desire to go to work. My kids roll their eyes when I mention another good idea. Why? because they know I won't do anything with it. I am depressed and don't really have any friends that I have anything in common with. It's like my lack of knowledge and know how and fear of failure, not to mention not having the money to just throw at something has kept me at bay of pursuing anything at all other than necessary jobs to keep food on the table. Now it those things are weighing me down. Never in a million years did I think at 44 I would be contemplating if this is what the rest of my life will look like and how can I possibly stand it. It sucks and I really don't know what to do!! This article helps a little bit though. At least I'm letting out my feelings and maybe I can face them now...


I am a firm believer that luck plays an extremely important part in our lives. We are either lucky or unlucky. Let's keep god out of it. I believe that luck also combines with the right place at the right time, right place wrong time, etc. Then, you have to figure in money. Your social status. All these things and more, revolve around each other, interacting, and determine our lives.

Then, there are the choices we make in life. Lucky choices or unlucky choices. Good choices, bad choices. It all ties in.

I am 64. Made some bad choices and consequently, where I am today is a direct result of these choices. Hindsight is wonderful, isn't it. I know exactly, if possible, where to go back into my past and make the other decision.

How is my life at 64? Happy? No, not really. Can I do anything about it now? No, not really unless I want to lose everything and maybe wind up living under a bridge....that is my biggest fear. Did I try to make changes when I was younger? Yes, five times I left the man I am currently residing with. Each effort was a failure because I did not have enough money to tide me through the temporary jobs that I had to take because no one was hiring and thus I always had to return to the place I left.

I had successfully divorced my first husband and I felt that was an excellent choice. I had a new life and a career. 1985 the market plunged and career went down the tubes. Met my second husband (the man I currently reside with)and that was probably one of the worst choices of my life. As the years passed, I would make enough money to leave him, drove 1,640 miles to get away from him, and as mentioned above, could not financially make it between the temp jobs. We had a son which compounded the situation.

Years went by, and the choice to leave became more difficult as I grew older. My career changed for the better yet not really better, as technical writers are never hired permanently, and thus the same cycle continued....temporary job after temporary job.

So, here I am with no choices left anymore. If I leave, there will be no house for me. Health issues make it impossible for me to work and I am now retired.

Have I been lucky or unlucky.....lucky to have beautiful children, unlucky to have to live with someone I absolutely do not want to live with.

That's life.

May be now that you are

May be now that you are retired and children are out of the house it is more possible to do what you want. I really appreciate that you shared your experience.
P.S. if you feel that the problem in your marriage is abuse, please get a book by Lundy Bancroft "Why does he do that". It's an excellent resource for women!

I really like this article

I really like this article and it seems to give a great hope. I am now at a point where I truly want to find my purpose and calling However, reading the comments sort of sobered me up. There are so many things that have to be carefully considered before dropping everything.

Im printing PURPOSE & putting it where I can see it everyday

Thank you for writing such a great article on purpose. I am in my 60s and in the worst emotional state I have ever been in. My purpose was bringing up two wonderful sons who are now on their own. Since then I have been floundering as to what my purpose is. I still don't know what it is and my sons are in their 30s.

I know there is something missing in my life and I have looked at all avenues but cannot seem to find the right one for me.

I love words so I guess that is the best place to start. You say - just write.

I am self employed at two jobs - one which is very satisfying. I am far from rich and sometimes -comfortable- is not even happening. I am divorced and single and alone - sometimes I am overwhelmed with loneliness but hey that's another topic for another time. I love your articles!

A purposeful life

Thank you for your words of wisdom. I do agree with many of your reflections. There is something about getting older - as a woman, any way - that makes me feel less brave about taking risks, making big changes in my life. I know that to move beyond the resistance to change, I need to carve out daily time for visioning a new future, give myself the creative space to do so, and impose self-discipline.

We must not let age get in the way of pursuing a life with purpose. At 53, I still have dreams that I want to fulfill. Take a step, even if it's just making a list of action items. Propel yourself forward with meaningful mantras. Surround yourself with supporters. Get up early every morning and walk outdoors to stimulate all of your senses. Just remember to put the items into play. Doing so will put you on he path to a purposeful life.

Thank you

Thanks so much for your comments, I am most grateful and appreciate you sharing your thoughts.

Really I am getting upset

Really I am getting upset these day but after raeding this article i feel there is a great hope to change myself.

this article is completely

this article is completely empty!

Thank you for this beautiful,

Thank you for this beautiful, inspiring article.

That voice of the little ego,

That voice of the little ego, you mention, is getting more constant and loud, and I keep trying to ignore. What if the calling you are getting - mine is regarding leading, what if you think other people would consider you crazy, or you consider your idea to outrageous? What then? How do you decide then?

Listen to your voice

Hi Jackie

Thanks for sharing. It can be hard to follow your own path when others are challenging it. Try to quiet your mind and tune into your own voice....then follow your truth. This is the path to purpose. Trust yourself. Great things come from courage. Start where you are and do your own thing.


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Megan Dalla-Camina is a strategist and author in women, leadership and wellbeing.


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