Raising Grieving Children

How children can survive the death of a loved one.

Thoughts after Fort Hood.

I have been travelling over the past few weeks and have neglected my blog. I was away visiting family in Tucson Arizona ,when the shootings at Fort Hood , occurred . This has left me with many thoughts which I would like to share. I imagine that each of us was left with many concerns about what happened. I don't think it is too late to share some of what still lingers in my mind. Read More

Thank You

I'm a military wife and mom, as well as a veteran. Our family has dealt with stressof several deployments as well as the constant relocations and lack of a steady support system. The military has sources available to help recognize issues that arise, deal with those issues, and get pretty much any help that is required. the quality and quantity of help available seems to varyby location. While my experiences haven't been very positive, I do appreciate what has been available to us. We have been inundated with information. Everywhere we look are support groups, self help seminars, classes, counseling services and more. For my family, the most helpful has been the fact that someone acknowledges that there is a problem. They were, the reason that I recognize the problems that have come up. It's nice to know that we aren't alone and that some recognizes us.
When my husband deployed for the second of five times, on September 14, 2001, my neighbor decided to tell my 7 year old son that his dad was going to war and wouldn't be coming home. We wouldn't have made it through that time without the Family Service Centers. We used the Navy FFSC (https://www.nffsp.org/skins/nffsp/home.aspx), and the other services have equivalents. They don't always have the right answers, but they are a wonderful supportive starting point.
Thank you for your concern for the children. They take on alot, and they don't have a choice in the matter. Alot of adults wouldn't be able to deal with a portion of what they do. I'm proud of my boys, and I'm terribly sorry that they have to deal with these things.

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Phyllis R. Silverman, Ph.D., is a Scholar-in-Residence at Brandeis University Women's Studies Research Center.

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