Raising Grieving Children

How children can survive the death of a loved one.

Age Makes a Difference

In a recent post, I talked about the importance of considering children's age in trying to understand what they are experiencing when they are dealing with a death of a key family member. I am typically referring to a sibling or a parent. I talked earlier about what this experience is like for pre-school and school-age children. Read More

Grandparents Passing Away

Last year my grandmother passed away and my niece experienced her first death in the family. She seemed to understand that our grandmother was very old and it was natural, but she did ask alot questions. She was sad of course but we were all very amazed in her ability to deal with the death and act in a mature manner. My niece was 7 at the time.

Knowing what to do

I guess, through our actions and reactions the children around us learn a lot. We should always pay attention to how we do act. Thanks for an informative post here. By the way, there's a new social networking site dedicated to parents and kids, it's called Bluepixo.com - it's a place for Moms, Dads, and Kids! Now, there’s even a chance to win a free iPod Nano! I'm inviting you to meet other parents. And enjoy parenthood to the fullest. Thanks.

Age of a child when a parent or sibling dies

Dear Jean,
Thank you very much for your comments. The people I am talking about are dealing with death in their family. They are either griieving parents or a grieving wido or widower. Does the social networking site you suggest talk about aprenting in gneral or about such critical times in parent's lives?

Phyllis Silverman

Have the conversation

My mother passed away 4 years ago when my triplet girls were only 4 years old. This year, we were able to publish a book, Good Night, Grandma that is a children's book on grief. As we share the book, children and adults ask questions, share memories, and feel support. If you have had conversations or played with children while they are grieving or are on the topic of the loved one who is gone, the questions that come later are sometimes easier to field. I have noticed that not only do my girls ask questions and express feelings of sadness when discussion includes things about Grandma, but they also help other same-aged or younger peers, (and can answer the questions, often better, than the adults!). I think the key is to allow the children to process, converse, question and play...to have the conversation around death and what it means, even if it is a challenge for the adults.

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Phyllis R. Silverman, Ph.D., is a Scholar-in-Residence at Brandeis University Women's Studies Research Center.

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