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Yikes. The Superbowl hadn't even made it to half time yet. But the ads already told a strange story about the nation's collective psyche. Read More
Castrating Woman: Rising from the Unconscious at the Superbowl
Oh, too bad. Every other moment of the year men are depicted on TV as childlike, incompetent and incapable of surviving without the smugly superior female. Perhaps it's time for women to lighten up and realize that you are not perfect and equally subject to humor.
And men weren't depicted as
And men weren't depicted as childish and incompetent in the ads described in the article? Who makes these ads, by the way? Men or women?
Most likely both men AND
Most likely both men AND women make these ads. Whoever does make these ads are insulting men only because they they know everyone else gets their panties in a bundle if even the smallest bit of humor is at a woman's expense.
Castrating Woman: Rising from the Unconscious at the Superbowl
An interesting counterpoint to these two commercials was the one introducing Dove skin products for men that came slightly later in the game. In showing the maturation of a male protagonist from boyhood to comfortable middle age it cast in a new light the journey that the other two ads dubbed emasculating, and then it asked a lot of the same questions you raised, about sexuality, aging, virility, and most of all, mature self image. Really interesting contrast.
kick em when they're down
maybe next year don henley will play this one in honor of your astute observations: men are pathetic and the advertising world is cashing in on it
Wow. A sense of humor would
Wow. A sense of humor would really be wasted on you. Yes the Who are old but the show was amazing and my children LoVED them. So how about celebrating the nostalgia for us old folk and celebrating that it crosses generations. it was a moment I enjoyed seeing their faces truly enjoying the music. As far as the commecials? Its reality. Maybe not for the holier than tho of you but look around and see how many women actually do that and then try to laugh; you'll feel better for it.
OMG, are you obviously the castrating female or what?
This blog by "Prudence" proves for me the fundamental accuracy of the Charger advertisement: controlling women demanding that everything be their way, asserting that they are always "right" and "superior," even while wasting hard earned dollars on obvvious vanity and efforts to avoid aging, etc. Just as women generally demand that everything be femininized to accomodate their (basically selfish and self centered) demands, Prudence now demands that the ads on the Super Bowl be feminized to reflect her female sensibilities. Hilarious that in her zeal to demand that even the Super Bowl become subject to her fermale control, she proves the fundamental truth of the ads she criticizes.
Man, is she angry...someone makes fun of female control issues and she asserts they are making "castration" accusations. And, it's beyond cruel and self centered for her to criticize the Who for being their age.
I, for one, support the notion that men and women in their 60s should continue to ROCK ON!, embracing their energy, spirit and personality in their 60s.
I suspect "Prudence" was not a rocker to begin with. Indeed, I'll bet she accused them of being "misogynistic" for enjoying sex, inclduing with groupies. I'll also bet that Prudence exhibits extraordinary control demands on all those around her, especially men; asserts her intellectual and personality superiority, indeed emasculates men in her zeal to "make them" "do the right (read, inherently fermale) thing". I'm not sure if she's miserable (more likely narcissistic), but I'd wager that most people, especially men, around her are either miserable or gay or "gave up on being a man 20 years ago."
I think men should go figure out women's favorite shows and demand that the ads for those shows all be "masculinized" so that they do not embrace the sycophantic fantasies of female superiority.
I commented before reading
I commented before reading your post. Sorry if it mirrors yours...Truth hurts
Ancient Theme Indeed
Prudence, it is true that the theme of the demanding, controlling, somewhat emasculating woman has been around for a very long time.
Why would you imagine that the theme has survived and prospered lo these many years?
I submit the theme has survived and prospered because it is fundamentally universal and accurate.
The advertisment for Charger that reminded the viewers of the incessant demands of women that everything be their way in the home, in social circles, etc., resonated with me immensely. Indeed, I giggled because it was so spot on.
You're just sore because someone revealed the truth of a major female flaw: controlling demands, incessant assertion of correctness, demeaning attitudes of superiority and lack of empathy, care, kindness or acceptance.
There are T shirts and pillows that ask: "If a man is alone in the Forest without his wife, is he still always wrong?" There's a bigtime reason for that stereotype and for the advertisement. That is, it is fundamentally accurate and universal.
As President of the American Pyschoanalytic Association, I'd think your time would be well spent on determining why women are so controlling, demanding and judgmental that the stereotype of them being that way has found itself into the Super Bowl. The issue and the problem is the female behavior, not the male observation of, and frustration with, it.
BTW, the only "non truth" in the ad is the Charger itself. A "real woman" would never "let" a man buy a Charger and, if he did, she would nag him, insult him and degrade him over the choice until he sold it. Because, women don't even think that the choice of car is an acceptable male realm. As any modern man knows, women demand that they choose the car, just like everything else. That, of course, is why muscle cars like the Charger are dead.
The ad was trying to find a few good men who have the courage to try to take back the "right" to choose the car they drive. But, we all know how that's gonna turn out. Boy, I feel sorry for the poor bast@@d who brings home that baby. He's gonna have to do a lot better than just keep the seat down, take out the garbage, pick up his underwear, clean the bathroom, go to work 80 hours, fix the car, the door, the dishwasher, go dress shopping, endure her furniture and decor, allow her to go to the manicurist, pedicurist, beauty salon, pay for the Botox, the mink, the jewelry, open the doors, pay for dinner, etc., etc. My guess is that his sweet kind and caring wife/girlfriend will just be incapable of having sex with him unless and until he unloads the Charger and gets her the car she wants --after all, she's the princess and he's the POS.
I don't know about any other
I don't know about any other women, but myself, my girlfriends in high school and my mother all loved the '72 dodge charger my dad bought when I was a teen. And if I could afford it, I'd buy one for myself. Your "fundamentally accurate and universal" truth is neither of those things in my experience. ("You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means.")
And your inability to debate a point without devolving into stereotypes and petty name calling is hardly helping your case. In fact, everything that you've said simply supports her case that there are some(not all!) men who think all women are nothing but downers and hateful when it comes to anything a man wants to do. Because you men are so supportive of what women want to do, yes?
It's a wonder men have
It's a wonder men have anything to do with women at all. If all the women I knew were what you describe, I'd cut all ties with them. That'll learn 'em.
For that matter, according to your logic, men are stereotyped as bumbling idiots who can't do a load of laundry without causing extensive property damage because that's fundamentally universal and accurate too, right?
Perhaps if men didn't lay
Perhaps if men didn't lay their balls on the kitchen table when they got home?
@Perhaps
If a man cannot relax at home, where? If a man puts his keys down to rest and his mate decides to own them, it is not his fault! Many women even try to control what a man says and thinks by constant corrections, scoldings and psychic abuse. The esteemed Doctor should know what that means.
Often, when a mans keys get picked up and stolen, he does not know where to find them again. If his wife is a thief, shame on her.
The pretentious American Bit%$ seems intent on being correct then, when she is old and dried up, she bitches about the lack of "real men".
In this climate, If prostitution was legalized, marriage as we understand it would end.
Prudence, sorry you're
Prudence, sorry you're getting a bad wrap. I really didn't see your blog as emasculating, rather just pointing it out.
And unfortunately, the emasculation of men by controlling women makes it almost impossible for those of us who support masculinity to find a man who's not suspicious of that support. Oh well, I'll keep looking and hoping.
Where's my penis?!?
Oh, there it is. WHEW! For a minute there, I thought some evil WOMAN had come along and removed it.
Anyhoo, keep up the good work with your skewering of gender dynamics.
If I want to be emasculated, I'll play basketball with my nephews. If I want to follow my woman around the Victoria's Secret store and smell the perfumes and touch the soft fabrics, and imagine how nice it will be to see her in her "special outfit" when we get home, I think I can safely say I feel VERY masculine in that moment.
Way to go Dr. Obvious. This
Way to go Dr. Obvious. This is nothing new. From Homer Simpson to Al Bundy, TV has a love affair with beating down men. Mostly white men but it is not racial at all. It is a further emasculation of the American male.
Pardon the question Doc but what would you know about being male? Aside from your conditioned responses. When TV airs shows like Cougartown, do you realize how not entertaining it is to watch women who's expiration dates have passed, get it on with young emasculated boys? Plastic surgeons have made a killing on your pretenses.
If women could see what it is to be male I might listen to your crap but with all due respect Doc, I think I see the cracks in your foundation here. Had you not caked so much on your surface, it might have been easier to conceal. A woman in America not wearing her age appropriately? Wow! You are such a hypocrite to point the finger. These projections ,Doctor, are you dumping your anger on me and the men I respect. The Who was invited to play. They played well!Period.
"Why scream?...When you lose your self inside the,,,, wide screen,,,,,, let life be a bowl of melted,,,, ice cream,,,, or be the deer thats caught in my,,,, high beam. Im rollin with the lights on.".....Im out.
3 years ago my wife told me
3 years ago my wife told me she wanted a Charger, so we got one. This year she wanted a Murano, so we got one. I liked the Charger, I like the Murano. I want what she wants and vice versa. At 48 years old, 6'1", 2401bs, with a 400 pound bench press, I'd like to think I'm a man's man. I like to have a beer with the guys and tell all the usual lies while I'm with them. I also like to shop with my wife because she's my best friend. If I thought she were the castrating type, I wouldn't have been married to her for 20 years. If she thought I was the type she could castrate, she wouldn't have been married to me for 20 years.
Maybe I'm naive, but I just thought the ads were funny. People should quit trying to analyze every little nuance of societal behavior and just let things go. It must be difficult for those who are of no particular importance are so insufferably vain that they have to find a way to make a living by analyzing commercial fiction and applying it to the sterotypes they believe to be represented by the ad. C'mon, it's just a funny ad. Let it go.
Right! Remember Tim Allen in
Right! Remember Tim Allen in the 90's kind of became a "Neo masculist. TV gave him a paycheck and turned his persona into Al Bundy. Homer Simpson.EtAl. Hollywood formula in exponential form. One practice I ask my students to observe is to fast from tv for 40 days. Some actually say"Ican't". Those who do, don't want it much when the 40 days is over... See More. Some go back, and their sadness returns.
One tv show I enjoy is 30 rock. They take no prisoners. Every character shows their one foot in the loony bin. That is why the show is successful, Universal lunacy!
·
Pick Up Artists
I'll have to refer you to this article written by one of your colleagues as to what is wrong with men.
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-urban-scientist/200908/turning-p...
Wow
I am just stunned at the negativity that some blog commentators like "LeanRainmaker" manage in response to articles with critical perspectives.
Dr. Gourguechon made some very compelling points in this article and yet this particular poster just responded with ad hominem type non-arguments. It's amazing to see how riled up some people get when they imagine a threat to their intractable idea of "masculinity." On the other hand, I can certainly appreciate people who don't feel their sense of masculinity is being threatened when observers like Dr. Gourguechon call into question some of its egregious aspects.
NISSA,What are you talking
NISSA,What are you talking about? This quack used sexist prejudice to support her ideas of what men think. I asked , how would she know?
Since she does not own a penis, she could not possibly know anything about it. She might have some education but no realization. The good doctor should stick to what she knows best. Good old western psychology. She was writing through her ass!
She could not possibly know anything about it
...because psychologists know nothing about what people think or how people see themselves and the world around them. [head+desk]
I guess I can see how you think she's assigning the problem to all men as a gender (ie. sexist), even though I didn't read it that way myself. I'd like to point out two reasons that I don't come to the same conclusion.
First, the line "Man's problem with the castrating woman" is described as an "ancient theme". The description of the problem as an ancient theme is a significant abstraction from all men today, or even most men today.
Second, the paragraph where she states "I actually know a whole bunch of strong, interesting, masculine, comfortably sexual men, who don't need to pretend to be [...] younger than they are, or look for [...] escapes from the women in their lives."
So she describes the problem in a way that isn't specific to all men today, then gives specific examples to disprove the assumption that it's a problem with all men today.
She ponders the advertisers thought process in the final paragraph; why they think this painful stereotype would attract buyers instead of repel them. The sexist thoughts in that section seem to come from speculation about the mindset of the advertisers though. Maybe the sexism comes off as her own to some readers.
Thank you for explaining
Thank you for explaining that.
Thank you for explaining
Thank you for explaining that.
amazing
I know, I know I'm a huge humorless bitch, but I can't believe how whiny and borderline sexist so many of these comments are. It's not in a way that makes me defensive or angry, but just in a way that makes me feel sad for you guys who are stuck with these horrible castrating bitches. Relationships should be partnerships, not power struggles. If you are stuck with who makes you so miserable, than you should leave or grow up and stand up for yourself.
And yes the ads were misogynistic, deal with it.
It's inevitable
That somebody will eventually show up and scream "misogyny!".
I did a generic news search on the Dodge Charger ad and turned up about ten or a dozen opinion pieces on it, at lamestream media places like ABC News, the AP, Boston Herald, PT, etc.
All but one have turned out to have been written by women.
Women dominate culture through sheer pomposity, spreading censure, exuding airs of moral and cultural superiority, and disdaining those "beneath" them (i.e., men).
It almost goes without saying that the pieces have all been negative, one might even say nagging -- thus driving home the point the Dodge Charger ad was making.
God forbid any commercial should be geared towards men, reflect the feelings of (some) men or, worse yet, poke fun at women a little -- for one freakin' day, and during a football game no less -- instead of making men look like idiots.
I suppose the beatings will continue until morale improves...
Cheer up, gals, Valentine's Day is coming in four days, so you'll shortly have a whole new set of issues to complain about!
It's inevitable
It's inevitable that some dude will eventually show up and yell "female psychologists and feminist bitches don't know how good they have it!"
I did a generic (read: unscientific) news search on the claims of heightened misogyny in this year's Super Bowl ads. I turned up awful comments like those above, even at traditionally academic or feminist websites. Disgruntled dudes seem compelled to go out of their way to tear down female and male authors, injecting hateful comments into the few places women and men try to discuss gender issues.
All turned out to have been written by men who seem to think they have nowhere to go to be traditional men. Apparently they think strip clubs are full of up-tight feminist women, bars do everything they can to draw hot young men into bars for the visual and sexual entertainment of older women, church pastors are now almost universally female, and men have little or no influence within ad agencies, most workplaces, communities or countries? Apparently they think Superman gets his strength from kryptonite too.
Traditional male stereotypes scramble to maintain their dominance within our culture by insisting most women are full of frivolous desires and concerns (women spending uneven amouns of time and money to look good has nothing to do with male expectations), insisting feminist men and women unreasonably object to sexist messages (when they should be laughing instead because dudes think it’s funny and true that most women are shrews), insisting educated women exude airs of moral and cultural superiority (that don’t line up with traditional airs of moral and cultural superiority given off by men), and insisting that feminist men and women disdain all men.
It almost goes without saying that most of the dude comments have been negative, one might even say nagging -- thus driving home the point the anti-Dodge Charger ad people were making (that dudes can't resist pointing out how awful the women they date or marry are, how men are entitled as a result, and how prolonged male adolescence has nothing to do with male dominated culture).
God forbid any commercial should avoid tearing down a specific gender to make the other feel better -- for even one day, especially during a nationally televised prime-time event watched by men, women and children alike -- instead of making men look like universally competent rulers of all things they do (virtually everything).
I suppose physical and emotional abuse will continue until dudes morale improves... and then abuse could become overlooked or considered normal and justified behavior.
Cheer up, oppressed dudes; Valentine's Day is coming in four days, so you'll shortly have a whole new set of reason to complain about women and the things you do in order to convince them you care about each other equally, in order to sleep with them and get your laundry done!
It's iinevitable
@ Andrew. God does forbid this! All that separates is sin.
Lot's Daughters
Tearing down women to make men feel better is encouraged by God? That's the opposite meaning of my comment. Maybe you read my comment wrong? Or maybe not, and we simply disagree with each other.
I've never believed that Lot's treatment of his daughters was inspired, or an appropriate model for anyone to follow.
I hesitate to discuss religious beliefs in this forum. If you’re interested though, see: http://hugoschwyzer.net/2009/09/15/lots-daughters-and-ours-on-sexualizat...
In brief, I've never believed the realm of universal truths was a zero sum game (the divine, spiritual or metaphysical). Things that are unlimited can't be broken down into limited parts. In other words, if a woman gains something in life she doesn’t take anything away from men, and vice versa.
Superbowl Ads
What an enlightening and at times hilarious blog and bunch of replies. What comes to mind after reading them is that obviously we are aware that we are all more simply human than otherwise. Plus most of us know that many girls love sex (who are heterosexual men doing it with anyway?),can buy Chargers, shoot guns,and fly jets -- and boys can use cold cream,cook, get pedicures, Botox, and pec implants.
But what I'd love to see is for us to take things to new and Higher Levels, in addition to the standard and eons-old gender wars between controlling women (or men) vs. victim men (or women).
They squelched the ad for the homosexual dating service but allowed the one for anti-choice and anti-medical privacy (Focus on the Family). What does that say about our group unconscious and state of our culture? Also, on a personal note, since I was in elementary school I loved going to football games. The best part for me was watching the sexy guys' bodies and checking out their uniforms, and watching them run, yell, bang it up, and hug each other ...and the fabulous half-time shows. Do you think we'll ever have ads that also include and) reflect homosexual interests, women's sexuality (whether gay or straight), and are fun and humorous at the same time?
Just my two cents. Thanks, Dr. G., for thought-provoking ideas, even though some bloggers got a bit prickly, irritable or attacking with ad hominem arguments with disdain for you personally and attempting to demean your psychology.
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