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Last week, a friend sent me this video:
For 10 minutes, you can watch a woman trying to get Siri, the animated personal assistant featured on the iPhone 4S, to help her get help. The question for the woman trying every which way to get Siri to understand her request is, "Why won't Siri help someone who is suicidal?"
But the question I was left asking as I watched, and watched, and watched—and became increasingly uncomfortable with Siri's unhelpfulness—was bigger:
Why is it so hard to help someone who is suicidal?
Many people who are suicidal don't come out and ask for help in the articulate, direct way that the woman in the video does. So, it can be hard to help someone who is suicidal because it's hard for someone who's suicidal to ask for help.
But, there was something else nagging at me as I watched and listened to Siri fail over and over and over again. Something sounded so familiar. It was Siri's refrain, "I don't know what you mean by..."
"I don't know what you mean by ‘I feel depressed.'"
"Sorry, I don't understand what you mean by ‘I feel suicidal.'"
Or this winner, when Siri is told, "I need psychological help": "I found 10 motorcycle dealers."
Sometimes, it's us, providers, friends, or family, who make it hard. We make it harder to get help because we make people be very specific about what they're feeling. Or we misunderstand, thinking that what they're saying can't possibly be true.
The best of us might try to get someone help, match them with an existing resource, only to find that what we thought would be a good service isn't open after 5 p.m., or isn't covered by insurance, or doesn't have openings for three months.
To me, Siri's responses were reflective of a good deal of what's going on in real life when it comes to accessing mental health services. Delays, confusion, lost time, a lack of resources, or at least a lack of awareness about resources—these are all realities of things as they are.
Yes, I'd like Apple to see this video and figure out an easy way for Siri to quickly come up with the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline number when asked anything about suicide, but more than that, I'd feel better if Siri wasn't such a reflection of real life. I wish it was easier to help someone who is suicidal.
If you've successfully navigated the mental health care system and have strategies to share to make it easier for others, please share them here.
