Today, guys can access the accumulated Wisdom of the Ages in the form of an iPhone app, courtesy of Pepsi to hype sales of their Amp Energy drink. As detailed in the Wall Street Journal article, the app has a plan for guys with chicks. In the name of science and persuasion, I downloaded it.
Not only is it funny, it is also probably useful. The app takes a strong marketing approach. It segments the chick market into 24 chickagories (Aspiring Actress to Women’s Studies Major) then offers a variety of explicit verbal tactics within each chickagory. (”Chickagory” is my term, coined here for the first time – a Google search of the term reveals no hits. Can you believe that? Thus, “chickagory” is my trademark and my lawyers will enforce it to the fullest extent of the law. You may make fair use of it as long as you cite me – Steve Booth-Butterfield. Hey, Pepsi guys, how did you miss this?)
For example, with the Trouble chickagory, the app suggests Lines, Plausible Warrants For Your Arrest, Why Don’t You Have Any Tattoos, FBI Most Wanted, and a GPS locator for nearby tattoo shops. In the Married chickagory, the app provides assistance with Suggested Alibis She Can Use, Lines, How Rich Is Her Husband (size of the diamond), and a GPS locator for nearby motels. For Goths, you can learn Dreary Quotes, Lines, You Know Your Vampires, and Goth Bands To Know About.
You can hit iTunes and visit the App Store to download this little gem, but realize its limitations. It’s a marketing approach, not a persuasion approach. If you’d like that app – not available just yet, I’m looking for a partner – let me give you a preview.
We’ll start with a dual process analysis and, down boy, we’re not talking about twins. At least not with this post. Maybe later. Still doing research on the problem. Promising leads, but the marriage thing is slowing it down, you know? Melanie has final say.
On with the opera!
First: There Are No Laws of Persuasion and If There Were Why Would Anyone Tell You?
Anyone who claims the killer chick-picker-upper app is lying. If you knew the Persuasion Laws, you’d have all the chicks, right? And since the chick market is not cornered, ergo, There Are No Laws.
Second: What’s your TACT?
A TACT is a precise statement of the behavior change you seek and it specifies the Target (Who) the Action (What) the Context (Where) and the Time (When).
Do you want to obtain contact information?
Do you want to dance or drink or talk?
Do you want to leave this place to hit another bar?
Do you want to make hot monkey love with her tonight?
Do you want to marry her?
Each of these TACTs require different persuasion plays and you need to start with the TACT or else you’ll look even more lame than usual. Put down your beer, look at her, and think about it for a minute. What’s my behavior goal with her?
Third: What’s her mental state?
Mental state is on a dimmer switch and varies from High WATT to Low WATT. When chicks are High WATT they want Arguments, information that bears on the central merits of the attitude object (you, here and now). If you have strong Arguments, they will Elaborate on them then generate positive change and you’ve hit your behavior goal. When chicks are Low WATT they want Cues, anything that influences without much thinking. The big Cues are Comparison, Liking, Authority, Reciprocity, Commitment/Consistency, and Scarcity (CLARCCS Cues).
Monitor her mental state by observing her nonverbals. If she’s paying attention to you, answering questions, leaning in, then she’s High WATT. If she’s not, then she’s Low WATT (and maybe bored to boot). Read the nonverbals, then launch either Arguments or Cues.
Fourth: What are strong Arguments?
Strong Arguments are strong from her point of view not yours, so you need to do a quick Vulcan Mind Meld a al Mr. Spock to learn what she thinks is compelling. Argument quality varies across chicks (some like Brad Pitt while others prefer Bill Gates) and within the same chick across context (you might look like Brad Pitt at last call or be mistaken for Bill Gates if you pick up the tab at last call). This variability is what makes persuasion so interesting and chick picking up so humbling. You never know and you have to either think quickly or else accept rejection gracefully.
Also remember, the Arguments are aimed at the behavior change you want. If you just seek a telephone number, then wealth, income, and job status may not be as important as the right appearance, friendly demeanor, and appropriate interest. If you’re aiming at toujours l’amour, tonight for sure, you better have the kind of heat she seeks and your mileage will vary for sure on that one.
Finally, always remember: It’s About the Other Guy, Stupid. Or, in this case, It’s About the Chick, Guy. Always generate your plays from her point of view. Nobody cares what you think is a strong Argument or a good Cue. What does she think is a strong Argument or . . . our next point.
Fifth: What are positive Cues?
The Amp app uses a lot of humor with its pickup lines and other suggestions which is another way of saying the Liking Cue. You say and do things that make her have positive affect. And, a lot of pickup lines aim at the Authority Cue trying to make you look like her kind of expert. These are the most common plays, which means you’re missing the other big four. Consider them.
Comparison – if other people are doing it, you should, too. Wait until you see other people around her clearly hooking up, then mosey over to her. Better still, wait until somebody picks up her best friend at the table, then move in. If she’s alone, get a conversation going with her, then talk about what’s going on in the bar, focusing on couples who look like they are in the middle of a pick up. If you cannot figure out what to do next, stop reading this and visit your favorite porn site, because you’ll get more action.
Reciprocity – when somebody gives you something, you must give in return. The obvious plays here are to buy her a drink or dinner or a play at a game. Chicks are immediately hip to this Cue with these ploys, so you need to find other ways to “give” her something. Is a light shining through a window in her face – close the shade for her. Somebody joins her table and needs a chair – get one for her. She can’t get the attention of a server – flag somebody down for her. Then, later, start a conversation and give her a chance to do something for you.
Commitment/Consistency – when you take a stand, you must stay consistent with it. You need to have a conversation going with her for this. Start asking questions about her beliefs, values, and strong interests. Get her to commit to stands that are related to your TACT with her (the behavior change). Want her number? Talk about free speech and an open society. Want hot monkey love? Talk about free love and start humming “If You Can’t Be with the One You Love, Love the One You’re With.”
Scarcity – when it is rare, it is good. This Cue should explain why most guys never pick up chicks. You think your package is rare when from her point of view it’s just one in a long line she can pick from. You’ve got to make something about you scarce, rare, singular, or unique, but not odd, weird, strange, or scary. The line between scarce and scary varies from chick to chick and from moment to moment.
