Have you ever wished you could 'un-say' something the minute it comes out of your mouth?
Or wished you could rewind an argument to that crucial moment - and respond differently this time?
With this simple technique you can can virtually turn back the clock - while simultaneously teaching your mind to do it differently in the future.
The technique is known by some as "post-hearsal" - and in our family, as a "Do-Over".
THE 4 STEPS OF A DO-OVER
1. Notice the Regret (compassionately)
As Kathryn Shulz says in her TED talk, regret has an important message for us (I won't give it away if you have not heard the talk). The point is to stop and feel the regret with self-compassion - like you would for a friend who temporarily messed up.
Then, take a breath and remind yourself that trust and connection are not built through "getting it right the first time" but through our willingness to keep trying.
2. Imagine What You'd Say Differently
In your mind, go back to the words (or actions) that you regret and make a guess about what would work better.
Now say the new words silently (or imagine the action) in your mind.
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