I was raped at the age of ten. That was fifty-three years ago. I know exactly what people are talking about when they speak of the life-long scarring of child sexual abuse. Yes, I've been following the events related to Penn State's scandal all week. And no, I haven't written any comments about it before now; I've been brooding.
Early in the week, when Joe Paterno, surrounded by adoring students, stood in front of his house and said he'd pray for the sexual abuse victims, I became disgusted. I'd hoped that, feeling remorse for having had any part in children being sexually abused, he'd resign. "Pray?" I said to the TV. "You're going to pray for the victims? Your definition of prayer is very different from mine." Over four decades ago, Brian Egan, O.S.B., my college chaplain, had taught me about the moral imperative of prayer as action, particularly in the face of evil. Ironically, Father Egan had come to my alma mater (Georgian Court College, now a university) from Penn State.
Jon Stewart, Matt Millen, and Penn State's Alumni Association know what to do in the face of evil. Stare it down, name what needs to be named, tell it like it is, and use the power of your talents, your heart and soul, (and sometimes, as any war Vet will attest, blood), sweat, and tears, to change what needs to be changed.
Jon Stewart's closing discourse on Thursday night's show was right-on. In a matter of minutes, he slammed Penn State's tragic disregard for multiple realities of the situation. I loved his outrage, his response-ability, and of course (given my previous blogs about the subject, you may have already guessed this) his labeling the ethos of football at Penn State as a religion, and then comparing its dynamics with the Catholic Church. (http://www.sbnation.com/ncaa-football/2011/11/11/2554060/jon-stewart-penn-state-joe-paterno-video). Thank you, Jon.
I also loved it when Matt Millen, ESPN's sports analyst and a former defensive tackle for Penn State, started crying on TV. But it wasn't just the crying that touched me. It was his instant openness to the struggle, his willingness to stay with it, to process the horrifying news about his once-beloved coach, football program, school. He apologized several times for his reaction, but I thought his reaction was beautiful. What came through to me was his genuine love of and protective feelings for children, his fidelity in the face of betrayal, his integrity. (http://blogs.orlandosentinel.com/sports-sentinel-sports-now/2011/11/09/espn-analyst-cries-while-discussing-joe-paterno-penn-state-scandal/) It was a dose of sanity during a week of one crazy news story after another. Thank you, Matt.
I have the privilege of being on the Speakers Bureau of RAINN, the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network. I say privilege for two reasons. First, I'm a sexual abuse survivor who's experienced enough healing that I'm able to speak about it. And second, RAINN is an outstanding organization (www.RAINN.org). Two days ago I received an email from Scott Berkowitz, president and founder of RAINN, announcing that four alumni of Penn State's class of 1998, Jerry & Jamie Needel and Bob Troia & Larena Lettow, have taken the lead in banding together in response to the scandal and were donating money to RAINN. Here are their words: "After having so closely identified with all things Penn State over the past 15 years, the recent events have shaken our beliefs - and those of other alumni - to the core. Simply put, Penn State is way bigger than the alleged actions of a few people. To honor the victims, our goal is to raise over $500,000, $1 for each of Penn State's 557,000 alumni..."(http://forums.footballguys.com/forum/index.php?showtopic=622875). Thank you, Penn State Alumni.
Soon after receiving Scott's email, I watched a news report in which T.J. Bard, Penn State's Student Body President, spoke about the candlelight vigil in honor of the victims of child sexual abuse, which was being planned for last night. He also discussed students' reactions to questions about today's football game, and their intention to wear blue in solidarity with the children who'd been abused. I'm wearing blue today, too. Blue is my favorite color.
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Note: The color blue is the international symbol for the the prevention of child abuse and neglect.
IF YOU HAVE BEEN RAPED, INCESTED, OR ABUSED AND NEED HELP, PLEASE CALL RAINN AT 1-800-656-HOPE or log on to www.safehelp.com
