Open Gently

Musings on the introspective life.

by Temma Ehrenfeld

Are You a Cyber-Addict?

Cyber-addicts aren't necessarily cheating, gambling, or surfing porn.

Published on July 6, 2010 by Temma Ehrenfeld in Open Gently

In a 2006 nationwide telephone survey of 2,513 adults, researchers at Stanford found that 13.7 percent found it hard to stay away from the Internet for several days at a time, 12.4 percent stayed online longer than intended very often or often, and 8.7 percent hid their time online from family, friends and employers.

You don't need to be cyber-cheating, gambling, or surfing porn to be overdoing it. You may just be spending too much time in front of the computer.

The tell-tale signs of a problem: if your Web-time comes at the expense of in-person relationships or you're using it to avoid other issues. How often do you choose online activities over time with friends or family? Are people you live with making jokes about your "addiction" or getting angry when they see you online? Maybe you are, in fact, avoiding them.

How often do you surf at the office? Maybe you're bored at work and indulge on Ebay because you need the stimulation of competitive bidding. Is there a work project you could volunteer for instead? Should you be looking for another job?

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Do you miss sleep or meals because you're so engaged online?

To test yourself, try cutting back. If you log on first thing in the morning, wait until after breakfast or lunch instead. If you tend to stay up too late sitting before the monitor, tell yourself to turn it off at 8 pm.

Tape this article to your monitor or a card saying "Are you done yet?" or "Do you know where your wife is?"

The common sense advice is to look for ways to have fun and connect socially in person. Join the church choir, a weight-loss support group, or a theater improvisation class, if you're shy. As Nike says, Just do it. There may be good reasons why you're glued to your computer. On the other hand, you probably could be having more fun.