Odd Girl In

You may not be the most organized person, but you are one wonderful writer! You ARE organized in your own way, although you might not realize it.

I can imagine Rube Goldbergesque cleaning regimens. However clean or filthy your apartment was, I bet hours were spent "cleaning" it.

Oh Pia,
I can relate to almost all you wrote about lack of organizational and cleaning skills. My house is clean(ish), but oh so cluttered. I live in fear that someone will just "show up" for a visit and see my mess. Oh...I care less now in my 40s than I did in my 30s. How many times have I heard "I came to see YOU, not your house"? But still, as I sit in my semi-dark, cold-ish house (yup, the hydro has a block, allowing only 15watts...cuz I couldn't pay the bill - this time, I didn't lose the bill, just couldn't pay it), I look around at all the crap I still have but don't need.

I totally get the industrial strength trash bags. Now if I could just use them. And then..get them out of the house!

Thanks Pia. I see more of myself in you with every post I read! Jasmine and I aren't so different after all! And by my appearance, no one would guess my dilemma. Hmmm...

Hugs and love to you,
Karen

BTW, I googled your Fifth Ave address - is this your old 'hood?? http://maps.google.ca/maps?q=%22815+fifth+avenue,+new+york%22&layer=c&sl...

Pia,

This post made me laugh. I think we ALL obsess over how clean or unclean our house is. When Indigo was little, I was a fanatic about a clean house. We had linoleum floors and I washed them almost every night because he crawled around everywhere. I was obsessed and my house was never "clean" enough.

Once I knocked the hot neighbor guy's door to borrow sugar. He invited me in and said, "Don't mind the mess, I live here." I hadn't noticed his mess until he said something. I thought it was the most clever thing for anyone to say.

Now that I am older, I realize that the house will ALWAYS need to be clean, but I writing deadline won't wait for a clean house. I learned to relax and if people don't like a lived-in house, that's their problem.

Anyways, about the NLD issue. Indigo is horrible about keeping his room in order. I have always just helped him clean it. We do it together. He did learn how to do laundry when I had mono for so many months in a row. He had to learn.

Great post. I think every person can relate.

Nathalie--I'm obsessively organized in someways and not at all organized in other ways. It's a constant battle but I have lightened up on myself and my house always looks "company ready."
Doug--yes I spend way too much time cleaning. Which would be good if things looked clean! I'm good at straightening up and for some reason cleaning the kitchen. I had granite counters made not for the "snob appeal" but because I know I can clean them well. Have faux stainless as I like the look better and stainless is too difficult to clean
Things are so much easier to clean these days!
Karen--I lived across from those buildings. My building was an old one that is worth an entire book about. We do have a lot in common. I'm glad if you can understand yourself and then Jasmine a bit better through my articles!
Sera--you're right of course. But you have a child which makes cleaning more difficult. I can't write unless there's some semblance of order but have found that the more space you have the easier it is to clean. But most people aren't New Yorkers and don't live in 450 square feet (the rental on East 63rd) or 630 square feet (the one bedroom coop) which I did find easy to clean but I organized it. Living in small spaces is so fashionable but people don't talk about how ruthless you have to be

Thank you all for making me feel better about something that was so shameful for me for so long

I discovered this blog much too late, which is so unfortunate - I'm loving it. I'm NLD as well and I relate so much to everything I've read so far. There are so many stereotypes surrounding the disorder, and you've dispelled two of them in this blog that are particularly important to me.

Coincidentally, I just cleaned my room for the first time in eleven years about two weeks ago. Not relapsing into a messy disaster for two weeks probably seems like such a small feat to anyone without NLD, but it's enormous for me. Once all the garbage and unwanted stuff is out (and there was so much of it in my case ... so much), it's 1000x less visually overwhelming and easier to manage all the stuff you actually do want. With the help of a very organized and patient friend to keep me on task, it was really no sweat and has made a huge difference in my day to day. I LOVE being organized now - which is the first of the stereotypes I wanted to address. NLD mess isn't the product of laziness or a desire to just revel in filth, I literally didn't know how to organize anything and was afraid of even attempting because of all the anxiety all that visual jumble was going to cause me, despite desperately wanting to be organized and wanting to put an end to the constant shaming I was getting from my family.

And now my clothes are all off the floor and actually ready to wear when I need them! This is the second point that made me smile: so often people that are considered weird or different, LD or otherwise, are often labeled that way because of simply how they appear to others. The image of the "loser" kid in mismatched socks and broken glasses and a stained turtleneck is probably what the average, uninformed person about LD would imagine someone with our symptoms would appear to be, and you seem to be defying it just like I am. I love developing my personal style and exercising my right brain by putting together colors and textures and proportions, and people seem to respond positively to it and really appreciate my style. Plus, it's always a great conversation starter when I feel way too awkward to say anything to someone I've just met and they initiate it with a compliment! I like to think that many people with NLD use personal style as a means of social survival, I certainly do.

Unfortunately, I'm now reinforcing the stereotype of someone with NLD who doesn't sleep and gets waaaaay too chatty when they're exhausted, but very long story short - thank you for this wonderful series and turning this idea of NLD being some kind of catch-all for misfits upside down. We're all unique, even within our one percent, and the misconception that we're not can really hurt.

I discovered this blog much too late, which is so unfortunate - I'm loving it. I'm NLD as well and I relate so much to everything I've read so far. There are so many stereotypes surrounding the disorder, and you've dispelled two of them in this blog that are particularly important to me.

Coincidentally, I just cleaned my room for the first time in eleven years about two weeks ago. Not relapsing into a messy disaster for two weeks probably seems like such a small feat to anyone without NLD, but it's enormous for me. Once all the garbage and unwanted stuff is out (and there was so much of it in my case ... so much), it's 1000x less visually overwhelming and easier to manage all the stuff you actually do want. With the help of a very organized and patient friend to keep me on task, it was really no sweat and has made a huge difference in my day to day. I LOVE being organized now - which is the first of the stereotypes I wanted to address. NLD mess isn't the product of laziness or a desire to just revel in filth, I literally didn't know how to organize anything and was afraid of even attempting because of all the anxiety all that visual jumble was going to cause me, despite desperately wanting to be organized and wanting to put an end to the constant shaming I was getting from my family.

And now my clothes are all off the floor and actually ready to wear when I need them! This is the second point that made me smile: so often people that are considered weird or different, LD or otherwise, are often labeled that way because of simply how they appear to others. The image of the "loser" kid in mismatched socks and broken glasses and a stained turtleneck is probably what the average, uninformed person about LD would imagine someone with our symptoms would appear to be, and you seem to be defying it just like I am. I love developing my personal style and exercising my right brain by putting together colors and textures and proportions, and people seem to respond positively to it and really appreciate my style. Plus, it's always a great conversation starter when I feel way too awkward to say anything to someone I've just met and they initiate it with a compliment! I like to think that many people with NLD use personal style as a means of social survival, I certainly do.

Unfortunately, I'm now reinforcing the stereotype of someone with NLD who doesn't sleep and gets waaaaay too chatty when they're exhausted, but very long story short - thank you for this wonderful series and turning this idea of NLD being some kind of catch-all for misfits upside down. We're all unique, even within our one percent, and the misconception that we're not can really hurt.

OK - Why is it so difficult for us to organize things? I mean really - why? I won awards for essays, but can't visualize a room. Is this typical for us?