Now Is Everything

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How to Begin to Cultivate Hope After Failing

Begin to Cultivate Hope After Failing

The scariest part of failure is being seen when you're most vulnerable and least perfect. It is far safer (and easier) to hide behind dreams and schemes. It is even fun to dream and scheme—to think "what if," and to create our own fairy tales—you know, something to look forward to, one day when you just know that it's the right time. But while we wait for the perfect time, we watch others soar—we listen closely to their tales and imagine how one day we will be telling a similar tale of triumph and victory. These tales, over time, often grow as we gain new experiences, watch others' experiences, and engage in endless daydreaming.

inspirational and motivational quote

Now, back to the point at hand—the scariest part of failure. When we abandon the confines of "life as usual," we leap, hoping that we will fly and garner the awe of those watching from the valley as we soar. But what happens if we don't fly?

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What most people aren't prepared for is how to cope with the reality of hitting the ground. It's not pretty—definitely not the fairy tale story that has been growing for years in your mind. And once you're there on the ground, it hurts... a lot. Your ego is bruised. More than that, your ability to dream and act on your dreams becomes painfully difficult. You no longer wear rose-colored glasses. Leaping becomes harder because you've lost your childlike naiveté.

So what do you do? How do you begin to tell your tale and cultivate hope for the future? You realize that you can't rewind your life. You can either hit pause or play. While hitting pause is a powerful part of the healing process, at some point, you need to begin hitting the play button more than the pause button. To do this, there is one thought that has helped me along the way: you have nothing to lose. Failing (especially failing BIG) provides you with a sense of freedom that you can never gain by playing it safe. It's this freedom that separates you from those who never leap. It's this freedom that you will one day tell about in your tale. It's this freedom of knowing how to get back up after hitting the ground that will allow you to soar far higher than you ever imagined possible.

This is your tale, are you ready to tell it? Begin by hitting play.

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Along with this post, I want to share a special project recently launched by a dear friend whom I greatly admire. The project is a resource-filled clubhouse packed with actions and how-to's to help you through the BIG struggles of life as well as the everyday struggles we all face. I can't begin to explain the different components of this clubhouse, so please take a moment to check out the project details. I don't receive any money if you sign up for the clubhouse, I'm just mentioning this because it's something I wholeheartedly endorse and believe can help so many. 

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If you enjoyed this post, I would love to invite you over to my personal blog, A Beautiful Ripple Effect

image: artsyville 

Carolyn Rubenstein is the author of Perseverance, a Clinical Psychology Ph.D. student at Harvard, and the Founder/President of a non-profit organization for young adult cancer survivors.

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