New Rules for Stepfamilies

Finding the missing peace

TOP 5 MOST COMMON COMPLAINTS OF THE BIOLOGICAL PARENT (about his or her spouse)

What are the top 5 complaints of biological parents?

Blended families create many, many opportunities for divided loyalties and conflicts. My last post was about the most common complaints of the stepmother so today I'm writing about things from the biological parent's perspective. Next week I'll write from the child's perspective. 

TOP 5 MOST COMMON COMPLAINTS OF THE BIOLOGICAL PARENT (about his or her spouse):

1) Why can't you see that I sometimes have to prioritize my children over you because they're children?

2)  Why do you think that I have any more power over my ex in divorce than I had when I was married to him or her?

3)  When you complain about my children, it's painful to hear because you're complaining about someone I love.

4) Just because I may agree with you that my child's behavior is a problem doesn't mean that I'm always going to handle it in the way that you want me to.

5) When you scold my children, it's hard for me to not come to their defense because I feel protective of them and I worry that your behavior is going to make it harder for them to like you.

 

What did I leave out? Stay tuned for the child's perspective next week! You can read more about blended family issues in my books The Marriage Makeover or When Parents Hurt

Find a Therapist

Search for a mental health professional near you.

 

 

 

Joshua Coleman, Ph.D., is a psychologist in San Francisco and Oakland. He is also a senior fellow with the Council on Contemporary Families. His newest book is When Parents Hurt.

more...

Subscribe to New Rules for Stepfamilies

Current Issue

Love & Lust

Who says marriage is where desire goes to die?