"The truth will set you free. But first it will piss you off." —Gloria Steinem
What could regular people like you and me have in common with celebrities we read about in the news who may have various addictions, marital and emotional problems? We may not have their fame, wealth, hopefully not the magnitude of issues they seem to be struggling with and lucky for us, not the media to document every action and mistake we make in our daily lives.
The one thing we do have in common is a tendency to often not pay attention to our gut. And then get in some sort of trouble because we didn't. We might know something in our hearts or minds is not right and ignore that feeling and attempt to proceed as if it weren't there. A relationship we know we shouldn't be in, or a job which is stifling - that uncomfortable feeling lurking underneath - but often the fear is that acknowledging it, owning it, whatever it is, means we might have to do something about it. Or, there may even be times that we rationalize foolish choices or do not even recognize that there is something wrong with our decision making.
We may have a thought or feeling that causes us shame and embarrassment which can create negative self talk about who we are. Consequently, we may then become or act in the way we fear most. In my thirty four years as a psychotherapist working with people seeking consultation for a wide variety of problems, the two characteristics that link everyone, are people not trusting their gut, and not wanting to deal with feelings and thoughts that all individuals experience sometime in their life. Anger, fear, insecurity, inadequacy, jealousy, competitiveness, are some of the least popular feelings to admit as one's own. The difference between thought and action is huge, and the more a person acknowledges, at least to themselves, the truth about what they might feel, the less likely they will act it out.