Verified by 
Many of us put a lot of pressure upon ourselves to achieve. We have an incredible tendency to compare ourselves to other people. If we don't live up to these imaginary lines of success that we have created in our heads, then we suffer. I want to offer an alternative to this suffering, a lesson we can all learn, courtesy of my six-year-old daughter.
Experience Child-like Joy and Happiness
Last year at school, an awards ceremony was held to recognize reading achievement. Usually, the younger children all receive awards while the older children compete against one another for gold, silver, and bronze medals. Last year, for some reason, they decided that the kindergarteners should be "competitive" too. What a world we live in!
It had been decided that the "competition" between kindergarteners would be based upon the number of sheets of paper they turned in throughout the school year, each sheet of paper representing one book. Unfortunately, my wife and I were unaware of this new rule and although my daughter had definitely read enough books to qualify for a gold medal, we hadn't turned in all of the papers.
My wife and I didn't care which medal our daughter received, because we knew that she loves reading and school, and that's what is important to us. Because she is in kindergarten and still quite young, my daughter was so excited when she got her bronze medal. When she sat down, she showed all of her friends, smiling brightly. When her friends all came back with their silver and gold medals, my daughter was just as happy. She wasn't comparing herself against the other kindergarteners, and instead, was excited about her own accomplishment.
Don't Play the Comparison Game
We must remember that we won't always win gold medals in life! We will all occasionally experience failure and we will all have set backs. No matter how successful we are, there will always be someone who is more successful. We must remember that if we compare ourselves to other people, we are going to suffer. To be happy, we must stop doing this!
Let's celebrate our children, our jobs, our friends, our memories, our lives! All we have to do is focus upon what we DO have in life. In doing so, we will lead a beautiful life because we will truly realize that every life is beautiful. However, the second we start comparing our lives to those of others, we will start suffering. Let us remember that even if we win today, tomorrow we may lose. Celebrating what we do have is a better way to live and is one of the key components of happiness.
To stop playing the "comparison game," we need to do two things. First, we have to accept the fact that comparing ourselves to others isn't good for us and that it will cause suffering. As long as we need our self-esteem to be validated externally, we will suffer. How many times do we witness people who are "on top" leading a path of self-destruction? Being a CEO or a famous movie star isn't necessarily the way to find happiness. It is far better to do what we love just for the love of it and to enjoy life as we are living it. When we are passionate about what we're doing and we're unconcerned about what others think of us, then we are happy.
Be Aware of Your Thoughts
The second key is awareness. We are conditioned at a very young age to compare ourselves with others. We must un-condition or re-condition ourselves. Throughout the day, we need to be mindful and watch our thoughts, observing how often we compare ourselves to other people. If we become aware of our thoughts, then we can change them. If we distract our thoughts and do something else besides making a comparison, then this constant comparing will happen less often. We must also be careful of other people who love to play this "comparison game." They are kind of like drug addicts, in that the "comparison game" can be intensely addictive. Would we want to have drug addicts as friends? No! People can get so caught up in always trying to be better than someone else. This way of living is purely self-destructive because if we live this way, we'll never be good enough.
So like my daughter, let's celebrate the bronze medals we get in life as joyfully as the gold medals. Just living is worth celebrating! If we manage to do that, then we will find that we are much happier and will enjoy life so much more.
