Married and Still Doing It

Do pursuers love their partner more then distancers?
And why is it that people want something more if they have a hard time getting it wouldn’t it be better to want what you can easily get more? Otherwise how can a couple appreciate reciprocation such as similar libidos or a similar kind of love for each other?
I guess it’s unnatural for a couple not to have a pursuer and a distancer when it comes to sex intimacy talking etc.

“Sex is like air; it’s not important unless you aren’t getting any”

Dear Reader,

No pursuers don't love their partner more. They are often more aware of their need for closeness. In fact distancers would be mortally offended at the suggestion that their love is less.

I think in terms of reciprocation, pursuers often miss the small movements of the distancer toward them. I agree that couples almost always split into differing degrees of desire for closeness.

I do think pursuers need to diversify their non-sexual interests... take up painting, invest in your career, develop more friendships so that their basket of fulfillment is naturally more full. It takes the pressure off their spouse to be their everything in other ways and gives the pursuer more happiness in general.

Thanks for the commment,

L

Thanks for this information. Very well-said and helpful.

Thanks for reading!

L