Part of what makes gratitude such a positive force is that it counters people's tendency to get caught in focusing on their problems or inadequacies.  It's hard to be consumed with envy of your neighbor's beautiful house while you are feeling grateful for the roof over your own head; which, of course, is associated with feeling happy. Similarly, you are less likely to take your health for granted while you are actively feeling grateful for it. Perhaps this explains why grateful people tend exercise more consistently.

Unfortunately, it is often easier to say that it's good to be grateful than it is to actually feel it; or to consistently feel it. But this can be done... with effort. A very important part of being a grateful person is to prioritize this quality in your life; not leaving gratitude for the Thanksgiving day meal or other exceptional moments, such as when you just miss getting hit by a car.

You might find it helpful to think of the feeling of gratitude as a muscle that gets stronger with use. To this end, below are two exercises that have been scientifically found to increase gratitude.

Gratitude journal: Keep a journal each night (for at least 2 months), listing at least 3 things that you were grateful for that day. You can even write repeat entries if your experiences recur. For instance, you might be grateful for your child or partner telling you that they love you; and if this happens on different days, it is worth noting it each time. While this exercise can help you feel happier, it is something you need to keep doing to continue feeling the effects.

In talking with my patients who have done this, I have noticed a common pattern. They often go from having difficulty even thinking of things to write; to having it come easier; to having grateful thoughts occur to them during the day; and, finally, to having it feel like more a part of them as people (feeling like grateful people rather than just making a gratitude list).

Gratitude letter and visit: Think of someone who has been a positive influence on you at anytime in your life, but who you have not thanked. Reminisce about how the person has made your life better, and then craft a letter to say thank you, being specific about what they did and how it affected you. Then set up a time to meet with the person without telling them why. When you sit down with them, read them the letter - slowly and with emotion. Give them a chance to react and respond. And, finally, take the opportunity to continue to reminisce together about what makes them so special to you. People who did this exercise in a research study felt a significant boost in their happiness for a month; but then this wore off after about three months. So, although this can really feel wonderful to do, you will need to find other ways to maintain gratitude if you want it in your life on a more consistent basis.

Of course, there are many other ways that you can bring the positive effects of gratitude into your life. For instance, you can pray or meditate. Or you can just try to be conscious of all the things you appreciate and express that appreciation. As with anything, the best time to start is now. But with Thanksgiving just next week, you have the perfect opportunity - among family, friends, and a culinary feast - to practice gratitude and enjoy its benefits.

Dr. Leslie Becker-Phelps is a clinical psychologist in private practice and is on the medical staff at Somerset Medical Center in Somerville, NJ. She also writes a blog for WebMD (The Art of Relationships) and is the relationship expert on WebMD's Relationships and Coping Community.

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