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Loose Girl

Ruminations of a Girl Gone Wild

Sex
Dating Tips for Love and Sex Addicts, Continued

Kerry Cohen on May 1, 2017

We are drawn to situations where we can both relive and attempt to heal our pain. In this way, every relationship is an opportunity.

We are drawn to situations where we can both relive and attempt to heal our pain. In this way, every relationship is an opportunity.

Sex
Dating Tips for Love and Sex Addicts

Kerry Cohen on April 9, 2017

We’re the ones who are all 'we had sex, so now you’re my boyfriend. We’re the Glenn Closes of the dating world. But it’s only because we, as women, are not entitled to love.

We’re the ones who are all 'we had sex, so now you’re my boyfriend. We’re the Glenn Closes of the dating world. But it’s only because we, as women, are not entitled to love.

President Donald Trump
The First Time Anyone Grabbed My...

Kerry Cohen on October 10, 2016

Donald Trump thinks his "locker talk" is just words. The truth is, most of us have experienced his words, and they are anything but innocuous

Donald Trump thinks his "locker talk" is just words. The truth is, most of us have experienced his words, and they are anything but innocuous

Sex
Women, Sex, and the Problem of Our Bodies

Kerry Cohen on March 2, 2016

Women’s sexual power in our culture is rarely about what we actually want sexually. Our power is based instead on who we are when we’re looked at.

Women’s sexual power in our culture is rarely about what we actually want sexually. Our power is based instead on who we are when we’re looked at.

Relationships
The Waiting

Kerry Cohen on November 18, 2015

Clients wanted to know how to change. They wanted to know what they had to do in order to be free of all the parts of themselves that continue to ruin their lives.

Clients wanted to know how to change. They wanted to know what they had to do in order to be free of all the parts of themselves that continue to ruin their lives.

Sex
"Sex Just Keeps Getting Better"

Kerry Cohen on January 9, 2015

She didn’t ask herself whether she should have sex with someone. She asked herself whether she felt safe. If she did, she thought, well why not have sex?

She didn’t ask herself whether she should have sex with someone. She asked herself whether she felt safe. If she did, she thought, well why not have sex?

Friends
A Cool Girl

Kerry Cohen on September 18, 2014

I didn’t think of the word ‘rape.’ I wouldn’t associate that word with this moment for many, many years.

I didn’t think of the word ‘rape.’ I wouldn’t associate that word with this moment for many, many years.

Anger
Good Fighting

Kerry Cohen on May 28, 2014

Arguing is normal. What's more, it's healthy. But arguing is an art, and there are definitely wrong (and right!) ways to do it.

Arguing is normal. What's more, it's healthy. But arguing is an art, and there are definitely wrong (and right!) ways to do it.

Relationships
Ways We Prevent Intimacy: The Pursuer/Distancer Pattern

Kerry Cohen on April 28, 2014

In so many relationships, this pattern of the pursuer and distancer occurs. One person pursues, and the other person distances. Both are avoiding real intimacy

In so many relationships, this pattern of the pursuer and distancer occurs. One person pursues, and the other person distances. Both are avoiding real intimacy

Relationships
Intimacy

Kerry Cohen on March 4, 2014

What if you could shed each of those protective vests, one and then the other, until you were just you. Open, available, ready to love and be loved. What would that feel like? That, right there, is intimacy.

What if you could shed each of those protective vests, one and then the other, until you were just you. Open, available, ready to love and be loved. What would that feel like? That, right there, is intimacy.

Friends
A Cool Girl

Kerry Cohen on November 2, 2013

This separation between choosing and not choosing, between rape and not-rape would be a hard one to untangle. It would take me many years before I understood that they both hurt me, and not in terribly different ways. But they were different. They were.

This separation between choosing and not choosing, between rape and not-rape would be a hard one to untangle. It would take me many years before I understood that they both hurt me, and not in terribly different ways. But they were different. They were.

Sex
What We're Talking About When We Talk About Loose Girls

Kerry Cohen on October 18, 2013

I thought only about the feelings that had strangled me all those years, the many times I walked away from a boy, filled once more with shame, not because I had sex with him, but because of my neediness for him, because boys never ever seemed to need me the way I needed them

I thought only about the feelings that had strangled me all those years, the many times I walked away from a boy, filled once more with shame, not because I had sex with him, but because of my neediness for him, because boys never ever seemed to need me the way I needed them

Sex
A Conversation About Girls and Sex

Kerry Cohen on November 16, 2011

Lidia Yuknavitch, author and scholar, and I sat down to discuss my book Dirty Little Secrets: Breaking the Silence on Teenage Girls and Promiscuity

Lidia Yuknavitch, author and scholar, and I sat down to discuss my book Dirty Little Secrets: Breaking the Silence on Teenage Girls and Promiscuity