Living Single

The truth about singles in our society.

Single at Heart in New Zealand -- She Is, Her Husband Isn't

Wife is single at heart, but husband is not

Writing for a New Zealand Sunday magazine, the Sunday Star Times, Anna Hart says this:

"A month ago my husband disappeared on a five-day work trip. I immediately got planning. I invited friends over for sushi. I caught up on my Mad Men viewing. I took myself on a weekend excursion on which I fossicked through op shops and mooched in cafés. Most dramatically of all, I ate five portions of fruit and vegetables a day, and even got the government-recommended amount of exercise. I was thrilled to see him walk through the door, but I'd had a pretty great week.

Last weekend I was the one away from home, and when I returned on Sunday night I learned that my husband had done nothing in my absence." [You can continue reading the story here.]

What an interesting concept for a story - and a true one, no less: A married woman discovers that she is single at heart but her husband is not. As I read about how she spent her time when her husband was away, I was cheering her on. She ends up, though, feeling ambivalent about what I think of as her resourcefulness. Read the rest of the story if you are interested, and see what you think. She seems to assume that living single means that you are not a "social" person and don't have friends or family, and of course I disagree with that. Still, it was fun to discover her story.

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Bella DePaulo, Ph.D., is author of Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized, and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After. She is a visiting professor at UCSB.

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