Yet another media outlet on the marriage bandwagon. If marriage was so awesome, no one would need to write books and articles stating how awesome it is.

I wonder if Caitlin cited sources, other than those of faith-based organizations?

Dr. DePaulo, you used a Tiffany-carved hunting knife on this article after dragging it into your home to read. (smiles) Carved indeed it was, and you did an excellent job. Excellent. Excellent. If in the future I need someone with great carving skills, you will be the first one I will call. Blog on, Bella!

After reading this post, before I go outside to climb in my hammock in the early morning sunlight, to be followed by a late morning swim, I wanted to chime in on this article. After all, I am in nor rush to do anything and I have the time to make some points.

I must admit after reading your comments, I thought about the life of the late Christina Onassis and her parents. I read the book about her life decades ago, one in particular, HEIRESS: THE STORY OF CHRISTINA ONASSIS by Nigel Dempster (1989). She to entered in to the institution of marriage four times, and her final husband, Roussel urged her to stay thin to be with him. She, too, met an untimely death. It is sad that the peddling of marriage myth is peddled hard and fast as the perfect formula for happiness and success in life all over the world. All one has to do is to look back in history to see that this is just not so.

In any event, one of my favorite authors, the late Catherine Woolley died at the age of 100 in 2005 at home. She wrote 87 children books, never married, traveled the world and was very independent. Even during her era, she did not buy into the marriage propaganda. What a life she led! At death, she left no survivors and no service was held.

Another excellent example comes to my mind is H.H Tony Cooper, Ph.D., 75 years young, who still teaches at the University of Texas at Dallas. He is an author of 20 books, lifelong bachelor, who keeps his European union citizenship, and lives in his adopted home state of Texas. He drives a rusty 1982 Saab and 1973 Cadillac El Dorado. Dr. Cooper is an authority on criminal behavior, and the field of international security issues as well as terrorism. His classes are: Terrorism and Civil Disorders: Destabilizing Stable Societies.

One more to leave with you readers as a live example is the marriage free author Tom Flynn, who wrote many books and this one in particular THE TROUBLE WITH CHRISTMAS (1993), where my interview is featured.

Last but not least, remember Dame Cicely Saunders remained single nearly all of her life as she re-shaped the end-of-life care, the hospice field. She married at the old age of 61 to an old man in ill health at the age of 79. This marriage produced no children. Dame Cicely died at the age of 87 in 2005.

***********************************************************************************
“In that sense, which few if any white American appear capable of grasping at present, classic television programs like Leave It to Beaver and Father Knows Best and The Andy Griffith Show portrayed an America so divorced from the reality of the times in which they were produced as to raise serious questions about the vanity of those who found them so moving, so accurate, so real. These iconographic representations of life in the United States are worse than selective, worse than false; they are assaults to the humanity and memory….who were being savagely oppressed even as June Cleaver did housework in heels and laughed about the hilarious hijinjks of Beaver and Larry Mondello.” (Pg. 259-260)
Speaking Treason Fluently-Anti-Racist Reflections from an Angry White Male by Tim Wise (2008)

Life goes on. I sleep very well.
Be well. Stay safe.

Dew, woman of color (outside in the early morning sunlight in my hammock)
A Single Pebble
Living in the Western Hemisphere

I didn't have a father since I was 10 yrs old. Beyond providing food/shelter I wouldn't say my mom was very loving.

There is definitely some stigma for the child without father, I often tried to hide the fact that I had no father.

I would probably do pretty well in any kind of academic test, I have 4.0 gpa spring quarter in my college.

Socially, I'm pretty much a failure though, I had very few friends, no girlfriend.

However, I can't attribute all my social failures to growing up with single parent, as there are other major factors not mentioned that probably had more of an impact.

My divorce has affected my children greatly, it has been 12 years and I have seen the negative impact. I do not think that all issues stem from a one parent household but it most definetely has caused great turmoil not to mention the financial factor. I do believe that if the marriage is good it provides a stable, loving and grounding environment which in turn is a positive on any child and from there one would hope that would carry over into adulthood. I believe that children from single family households carry much added stressors from a very young age and are not as grounded when it comes to family stability.

The TIME's article convinced me! One parent is bad and two is good. That must mean that three would be even better! Or how about four?

Dr. Depaulo. I hope you consider writing Time and requesting they publish your rebuttal. This is just the kind of thing that sets me spinning. Reporters, with a dash of the pen, distort, over simplify or exaggerate research results. And millions read it and take it as truth. Not only is this article a shocking piece of marriage propaganda, it also shows a flagrant disregard for science.

On CNN this evening while in discussion about the TIME magazine article on marriage, author Alex Wellen of the new book LOVESICK ,a novel, said he is married for six years now with one child. Mr. Wellen also said during the interview, he does not have the key to marriage. True, no one does. At least Mr. Wellen was honest.

The institution of marriage is a dark fairy tale, see examples below:

Actress/singer Vanessa Williams - divorced twice
Sandra Loh,
The ex-Mrs. Chuck Finney (book: The Billionaire who wasn’t There….)
Mrs. Ruth Madoff
Singer Diana Ross, she, too, has been in and out of the institution of marriage numerous times in her life!
Gov. Sanford’s wife of S.C. just to name a few, (what a slap in the face he gave his wife after 20 years of marriage and children by telling the media he met his soul mate! June, 2009), but the
list goes on……..To include, April 16, 2007

Divorce has its price — and no celeb, it appears, knows that better than Michael Jordan. The basketball superstar's split last December from his wife of 17 years, Juanita, is No. 1 on Forbes.com's list of "The 10 Most Expensive Celebrity Divorces."
Juanita Jordan could possibly "get more than $150 million in a settlement, making the Jordan divorce the most expensive in entertainment history," Forbes said.
Neil Diamond, whose 1995 divorce from Marcia Murphey cost him an estimated $150 million, holds second place.
Steven Spielberg comes in third for paying his ex-wife Amy Irving an estimated $100 million, which was then half his fortune, when they divorced in 1989. The Oscar-winning director is now worth $3 billion.
Also making the list are estimated settlements between Harrison Ford and Melissa Mathison ($85 million); Kevin Costner and Cindy Silva ($80 million); Paul McCartney and Heather Mills, whose divorce could cost him more than $60 million; James Cameron and Linda Hamilton ($50 million); Michael and Diandra Douglas ($45 million and two homes); Lionel and Diane Richie ($20 million); and Mick Jagger and Jerry Hall ($15 to $25 million).

Don’t forget vegetarian actress Kim Basinger and Actor Alex Baldwin highly publicized marriage and divorce; now Liz Watson second wife of Barry bonds has filed for a divorce and, lets include for fun, vegan Pamela Anderson’s many marriages and divorces.

Readers, there is one breath of fresh air that is single and childfree Ingrid Newkirk as I write. (I am not a fan of PETA.) However, I learned while watching in December, 2008 at home alone during the holidays, the DVD, I am an Animal: The Story of Ingrid Newkirk and PETA, she decided to have herself medically sterilized at the young age of 22, because she knew then she did not want children in this life. She is also an atheist.

Life goes on. Sleep well.

Dew, woman of color
A Single Pebble
Living in the Western Hemisphere

March 15, 2009
NYT Social Q’s
He’s 80 and in Demand
By Philip Galanes

I am 73 and my gentleman friend is 80. For the last 13 years, he has taken me to dinner twice a week, and for the last 12 years, we’ve driven to New England to see the leaves turn. But last year he took another woman to New England and didn’t tell me. When I asked him why I had to hear the news from someone else, he said he wanted to avoid a confrontation and wouldn’t discuss it.
We’ve resumed our dinners. But I hate to wait until October this year to hear who is going to New England. My friends tell me not to rock the boat, but my emotional energy is waning. Any suggestions?
Anonymous, Chagrin Falls, Ohio
Gosh, I’m sorry. It must be hurtful to feel replaced — or supplemented, anyway — so casually. Who could enjoy the early bird special, wondering if it’s their last?!
Your beau’s dalliance with his leaf-peeping hoochie mama may have been a one-time thing. But there’s no way to know — or figure out where you stand — without drawing him into the very discussion he refuses to have.
Try coaxing him into it by letting him know you’re not angry; you just want to understand the lay of the land. Old habits die hard, though, and he may persist in his unwillingness to talk about it — in which case, you’ll have to decide on your own whether to continue seeing him.
It’s nice to have a regular beau. But evenings with shut-down folk can often be lonelier than the ones we spend solo.
For help with an awkward social situation, send queries to socialq@nytimes.com or Social Q’s, The New York Times Style Department, 620 Eighth Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10018. Please include a daytime telephone number.

I read this in the NYT.
Dew

HEADS UP READERS:

Single and childfree, Larry Haubner, 107, who is a bit of a health nut was in the national news again about his assisted living center bills, but seemed to have lived a good life without the spouse and children.

AND, on June 27, 2009 it was reported:

Everett millionaire, waiter leaves rich gift to students
By JULIE MUHLSTEINThe Herald

Tony Bozich worked as a waiter and died a millionaire.
He lived simply, in a downtown Everett apartment. He had no car, no TV, not even a telephone. He never graduated from high school.
What he did have was a knack for investing in the stock market.
"He read the Wall Street Journal every day. And he amassed a great deal of money -- millions," said Jack Decker, who worked with Bozich as his investment adviser for more than 20 years.

A decade before Bozich died, in 2004 at age 94, he put his money where his heart was. He donated a significant chunk of his holdings as an endowment to fund scholarships given each year by the Rotary Club of Everett. This year's $64,000 Bozich gift was part of $228,950 given to 2009 graduates at the Rotary's May 19 scholarship luncheon.

The Bozich funds were distributed in four $16,000 scholarships, all for students pursuing math, science or medicine. These and stellar graduates from years past and into the future will live their dreams because of one man's generosity. Bozich told Decker he'd grown up in upper Michigan and ended up in an orphanage. "He and two other guys decided to leave one day, at 14," Decker said. Bozich told of working in logging camps in the 1920s.

"The best job he ever had, he was a waiter at a Cincinnati country club," Decker said. There, Bozich had told him, an older woman at the club suggested he start saving $5 from each paycheck and invest in the stock market. She convinced him to read the Wall Street Journal and even gave him old copies of the paper.
Bozich was divorced and had no children. Tisdel, a former Everett Rotary president, said Bozich had a sister, now deceased, who lived in Marysville. He believes Bozich came to Snohomish County to be close to her.

As he befriended Bozich, Tisdel saw the man's frugal ways. "He was
an old-fashioned gentleman's gentleman," said Tisdel, who also saw the elderly man's unique character. "If you saw him walking down the street with his two plastic bags, you might think he was a street person," he said.

He lived his last few years in an Everett retirement center. Until then, he lived alone in an apartment on Everett's Colby Avenue. A champion of Everett Transit, Bozich would get on a bus, get a cheeseburger and a cup of coffee at the 41st Street McDonald's, and be home in half an hour, Tisdel said. "And he could have spent all day doing whatever he wanted," he added.

Decker's eccentric client often wouldn't take the investment advice he heard. "He didn't go with what I said. He'd read the Wall Street Journal and go to the library. He did a lot on his own, with good common sense," said Decker, who met Bozich when he worked for the Foster & Marshall investment company.
---
Information from: The Herald, http://www.heraldnet.com
Copyright © The Seattle Times Company

What does the institution of marriage have to do with living a full, healthy, and satisfied life?

Dew
A Single Pebble

While a bit judgemental, I actually found the Time article fairly straightforward. Sorry. I just don't buy your claim that children from single-parent households do 'just as well, IF NOT BETTER' than those from two-parent households.

Of course, having one GOOD parent is worlds better than having two disinterested parents...

One note is the recent book by Lance Armstrong's mother, Linda Armstrong Kelly, who talks about life as a single parent with her son, Lance. I saw her interview years ago on TV, talking about their life without Lance's biological father being involved with them. Lance Armstrong (though now divorced himself with children) did not turn out too back from not having his biological father involved in his life.

Dew
A Single Pebble

Readers, for those of you who have not seen this DVD - 51 Birch street, a film by Doug Block, is a work of art. I view it many years ago. For those of you who don’t know, documentary filmmaker Doug Block always thought his parents 54-year marriage was a good one. But when his mother dies, unexpectedly and his father swiftly marries a former secretary. He discovers a family history far more complex and troubled than he ever imagined. 51 Birch Street is a must see in my opinion!

AND, For Many Older women, Sexual desire is a power surge by L. Kennedy, Advertising Writer, The Dallas Morning News (2004) wrote:

Doctors get lots of training about he reproductive years, says Leah Kliger, an assistant professor in the university’s School of Public Health. “The don’t have a lot of training in the aea of older women’s sexuality.” Ms. Kliger, a health-care educator and hospital executive, says busy physicians are often unable to discuss the matter. They have 15 minutes per appointment, she says, and that’s not a lot of time to discuss a sensitive and potentially embarrassing subject. Furthermore, she says some physicians are embarrassed because the patient looks like their mother or grandmother. Ms. Kliger says her research revealed “a resurgence of sexual appetite among women in their 70s, 80s and even 90s. Evelyn Dahms, 92, San Diego was dubbed the self-pleasuring queen by Ms. Kliger and Dr. Nedelman. Married to her third husband for 52 years and widowed for the last four years, Ms. Dahms says she satisfies her sexual urges by herself. However, Ms. Dahms self-pleasuring odyssey began 30 years ago. “My husband was drinking a lot and it diminished his sexual urges, Ms. Dahms says, and I needed some stimulation. I was reluctant at first, she says, nothing the once-taboo subject is no longer off-limits. Now, she says she is no longer reticent. I just turn on the music and have a glass of wine. Besides, she says, self-stimulation has health benefits. When you get older – it stimulates circulation and increases your heart rate. It’s a nature thing, says Ms. Dahms. It hasn’t gone away. I am very blessed. For more information visit www.womenbeyond50.com

Last but not least, one will learn a lot about the institution of marriage by reading the book, SQUANDERED FORTUNE: THE LIFE AND TIMES OF HUNTINGTON HARTFORD (1992) BY Lisa R. Gubernick. Hostage to fortune, dysfunctional marriages, after squandering his vast A&P inheritance, Huntington turned to drugs, then vanished from sight. Years ago, before he died, finding the 93 year old playboy in Lyford Cay, a reporter revealed his gilded past, his dark years as a recluse, and how his daughter came to his rescue.

BUT, Panama, north to Alaska: Earl George, 95, still has the drive
By Susan Gilmore Seattle Times staff reporter

Two years ago Earl George, as a 92-year-old with just one good eye and three words of Spanish, drove in his 2002 Cadillac to Panama. He put 12,000 miles on his car, got many flat tires, ate day-old pizzas in the back seat and struggled with a significant language barrier.
Asked what his next adventure might be, he said maybe he'd drive to Alaska.
He did.George, now 95, just returned from a 5,500-mile trip from Lynnwood to Prudhoe Bay in the same Cadillac. "I don't drink whiskey, chase girls or bark at the moon anymore," said George, who lives in Lynnwood. "There's no place else to spend my money."

And as a widower, "I have no wife to say you can't do it."
He figures he put 600 miles on his car each day. Asked how much his trip cost, he said it's all on plastic and he won't know until the bills arrive. "If I'd added it all up, it would have spoiled the trip." His itinerary was spontaneous.

What did his doctors say about his trip to the far north?
"I'm 95. It don't matter a whole hell of a lot if I just die. I got my time in and am ready for a transfer. If I got sick and died, that's someone else's worry." His doctor told him he would see him "if" he got back. Trying to talk him out of it wouldn't have done much good, George said.

His next trip? George plans to drive to Cape Cod, Mass., in November to attend a military reunion. He may drive to the tip of Maine, too, just to say he's crossed the country end to end.
The odometer on his car? It showed 114,062 miles when he rolled back into Lynnwood.
Susan Gilmore: 206-464-2054 or sgilmore@seattletimes.com
Copyright © 2008 The Seattle Times Company

Looks like Earl George is having fun and freedom beyond the institution of marriage in old age.
Dew, a woman of color
A Single Pebble

Dr. DePaulo, here is another fine read! Looks like in the institution of marriage, women are needing additional sex, hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

Enjoying your own body isn't cheating on anyone TheStar.com - living - Enjoying your own body isn't cheating on anyone
May 23, 2009 Ken Gallinger

Q: My husband and I have been married 20-plus years. It's a happy marriage and we have a good, but limited, sex life. We seem to be at a stage where his sexual needs are considerably less than mine – he's satisfied with once a week but I want more than that.
So, my question: Is there anything wrong with a woman in my situation masturbating to fill the void? I've tried it a few times – but I feel guilty doing this behind his back.
It almost feels like cheating. Am I really doing anything wrong?

A: Goodness!
If everyone who ever spent a little quality time with their own right hand were guilty of cheating, there wouldn't be any of us left to cast the proverbial first stone.
There are two aspects to your question. I don't know your age but "married 20-plus years" suggests you've been around a while. So you were likely sold the "masturbation is nasty" bill of goods when you were a girl. "Nice girls don't do that," etc., etc.
So repeat after me: "Masturbation is healthy and masturbation is fun." Think of it as a mantra and keep repeating it until you believe it. We wouldn't have half the problems with deviant sexuality in our world if more people privately practised manual dexterity or the creative use of a vibrator.

The second part of your question is more difficult. Why in the world are you doing this behind your husband's back?
If it's simply a matter of your being embarrassed, then, maybe, after you've recited the above mantra a couple of hundred times, you'll feel okay discussing it with him – maybe even suggesting he join in the fun.
Nobody ever said this had to be a solo activity. Heck, there are even two-person versions of solitaire!

Many sex therapists recommend mutual masturbation as a way to increase sexual pleasure within a relationship, especially when more conventional forms of sharing are not working at the moment.
So if you're just embarrassed, get over it and invite him to play along.
After all, once a week may be often enough to go to church but it's a little thin in the intimacy department.
But I hope there's not something deeper behind your fears – and I suspect there might be.
Are you married to the kind of man who thinks he controls every part of you – even your personal pleasures? If so, you've got a deeper problem.
It's not up to me to judge why you choose to stay for more than 20 years with a man who makes you feel guilty and afraid. But if you're married to this kind of guy, then you're absolutely entitled to your private sexual pleasures.
You are not violating any trust whatsoever by enjoying your own body in your own private way – so don't tell him.
I don't know the man you're living with...but you do. If he's going to punish, berate or humiliate you for finding pleasure in your own body, keep it to yourself.
But if you're just being shy, give him the chance to lend a hand.
And offer one in return.
Sometimes even an old engine fires again if it's cranked by hand.
ethical@sympatico.ca.
=====================================================================

--This afternoon, I am listening to The Spare Room (Audio CD) by Helen Garner (2009). The character is Nicola, which this book is based. This is her late friend, Jenya Osborne, whom the author nursed for a long time during her final illness.

Dew
A Single Pebble

Hi Dr. DePaulo and Readers:

In reference to Time’s magazine article, after reading this book, 2011: Trendspotting for the Next Decade (March 2008) by Richard Laermer , I wanted to share one last point. Gee. Gosh. Golly, hmmmmmmm. ooh.
In the chapter, The Truth About “Kidlessness” and the Future of Pals with a Little One between Them (pg. 268 - 272)

Trend: It’s all about friends, not babies. If you’re offended, take a number.

“ In years to come, being kid-free will become less of a stigma-instead elicit jealousy pangs! People with no kids get to do everything, and yeah, we get it, the child’s kiss and hug is sure wondrous, and yet people wonder if the cleanup followed by terror is worth it. What fresh hell! I speak—shaking my head in delight—of a politically incorrect movement, a crazy change of pace, that started around the world recently. Its called Childfree.

Unruly children make the kidless nuts! I’ve said to my friends who complain about their messy homes “I didn’t tell you to have them.” We are stating the unobvious: I’m friends with you, not with your kid.”
For the millions of us who choose to remain without offspring, it’s our yucky freedom after all. We find it strange when people inform us what great parents we would make. And, yet, we have to thank someone for keeping the race alive.

You think I’m talking about kids, but I’m saying that friendship is what matters. If the bond is real, it survives distances, fights, kids, illness, and even death. It does not matter who lives in the house. You were there before, and you will be there when the nest is empty. A friendship is like a garden. You have to tend it and water it. Or the thing dies.”

Yes to the future, with friends! I agree with this author.
Have a good decade.

Dew, woman of color
A Single Pebble
Living in The Western Hemisphere

Articles like this one in Time make me sigh with frustration. Sometimes I wonder why they bother to spew their propaganda, and then I remember that marriage is an attractive panacea because it's easy. The studies that Bella cited suggest to me that at-risk kids come from homes that have suffered a breakdown in communication, familial discord, parental detachment, and general upheaval and chaos, not necessarily homes that have been sanctioned by a marriage license. But it's so much easier to get the marriage license than it is to work through long-term therapy. It's so much more fun to talk about hot dates and weddings than it is to talk about how to develop better parenting skills. I think the media offers up marriage as a quick fix because no one wants to hear that true familial harmony can only be achieved through conscientious effort.

My own anecdotal evidence also tends to support that it's quality of parenting, not quantity of parents(!) that matters. Some of the most troubled people I've known have come from two-parent families but had unstable, distant, or even abusive relationships with their parents. On the other hand, a few of the most well-adjusted people I know were raised in single-parent or blended families.

Excellent post! I look back on some of my friends growing up who were from "single parent" homes- all of them for different reasons really- and they were the best kids parents could want- driven, academically successful, good at sports, moral...all this despite the financial issues single mothers tend to face. These kids went to great colleges and are now succeeding as adults. I've never bought the whole single parented kids do worse thing based on the personal observations I've had in my life. As Bella has pointed out in earlier posts, single parents tend to expose their kids to more family members and community support. I think absolutely occurs a lot and I think it has a great positive impact on kids. I don't see how it couldn't.

Excellent.

Dew
A Single Pebble

“Marriage proved to be such a fruitful ground for the growth of white supremacy because it reached well beyond the realm of romance. As a social institution, marriage links individual desire to social respectability and financial responsibility; it also links citizens and their dependents to the state. Because it stretches seamlessly from romance to respectability, to responsibility, marriage has extraordinary power to naturalize some social relationships, and to stigmatize others as unnatural.

When societies decide who can and who can’t legally marry, they determine who is and isn’t really a part of the family. These inclusions and exclusions take place at such an intimate level that they shape what seems natural, and, in turn, what is stigmatized as unnatural.

As I will show, the history of miscegenation law stretches from the passions of White male slaveholders and fur traders to the halls of state legislatures; from sensational newspaper scandals about White women and Japanese American men to the actions of local district attorneys; from the machinations of white realities eager to take property away from Black or Indian women to the process of race-making in criminal, civil, and probate courts, from the eager hopes of Filipino immigration laborers and the confusion of marriage license clerks to the intricate design of the modern American administrative sate.

The second fiction of miscegenation law, the scientific one, held that racial purity as could and should be protected. Its roots were in the writings of race scientists, who posited a fine number of “pure” races and insisted that races needed to be protected from intermixture, which was deemed to be a catastrophic mistake.” (Introduction, pages 2-7)

“Debates over the wisdom of miscegenation law often read like debates over the institution of manhood during Reconstruction, when Black legislators struggled to limit the sexual access White men had long enjoyed to Black women;…” (Introduction, pg. 12)

WHAT COMES NATURALLY - Miscegenation Law and the Making of Race in America by Peggy Pascoe (2009)

I found this book to be a dark fantasy and it does what it sets out to do! It is a nice read on a lazy Monday afternoon. Also, this book trails Dr. DePaulo’s groundbreaking book.

Dew, woman of color
A Single Pebble

I read the Time article and headed for your blog knowing you could put your finger on exactly what I found so repulsive about it. Great work.

Stories like the one in Time drive me nearly crazy. It bothers me that Time doesn't bother to check the interpretation of her research, nor question her using exclusively rightwing anti women's rights propagandists. I'm glad FAIR rightly characterizes Flanagan as "anti-feminist" (I got to this site through FAIR's podcast).

You bring up some very important points, especially the point that not everybody chooses divorce. I, for one, was given no choice by my philandering ex-husband (although I have long since realized he actually give me a one-way ticket to sanity that, for various reasons, would probably have taken me much longer to choose on my own).

My daughter, I think, was fortunate in that she was so young (3) when I divorced that she has no memory of us ever having been together, and she experienced no grief during the separation. I've asked her several times if she thinks she has suffered because of the divorce; she's repeatedly told me she doesn't think so. Maybe she tells me what I want to hear, but I don't think so. (At 16, she certainly doesn't hold back in criticizing me for other things!) Her father has remained very active in her life. That's one thing that neither you nor Flanagan addressed. Surely whether a divorced father remains in the child's life can make a difference in that child's life, no?

Just wanted to say thanks, Bella. Keep fighting the good fight against the anti-women's rights pontificators like Flanagan. She reminds me of Phyllis Schlafly. Another working woman of an earlier generation, who liked to write books telling other women that they shouldn't work. Meh.

Welcome, Katydid! I listened to that podcast, too, and loved it. I'll look for the link and include it in a future post. Yes, you are right about the father's involvement. Problem is, that's rarely measured in research studies.

On page 2 you claim that "...children from single-parent households did the same or BETTER." but then offer no such evidence. Instead you have identified a couple countries where the differences were not significant and then go on to misattribute these differences to public policies that are not unique to Iceland and Austria.
Sounds like the resident 'expert' is cherry picking among the less reliable and significant results for sake of social commentary. Me thinks you doth protest too much when Ms. Flanagan does the same.