Last weekend, I started drafting a post for this space about muddled L-words -
Loneliness, Loners, and Living-alone - and about one very enchanting S-word: Solitude. I found some wonderful writings, some scholarly and others more literary, about the true meanings of loners and
introverts. I thought my essay would be a two-parter, with the second post addressing a big-picture question I've been pondering these days: In the balance between solitude and sociability, or between autonomy and connectedness, are we (as a society) beginning to tilt more toward solitude and autonomy than we have in the past? That's probably not very clear right now, but one of these days I'm going to spell it out. And write that first post about L-words, too.
In the meantime, though, I want to thank the readers of this blog and of Singled Out for e-mailing me with headlines from the latest studies. Once I get one of those singles-bashing media stories in my sights, I can focus on little else until I can track down the original scientific reports and see what they actually did say. I'll share the full debunking when I finish writing it out, but for now, I'll offer this preview.
Here are a few of the ominous proclamations and captions in recent media reports:
• "Singles 'face Alzheimer's risk'"
• "Domestic bliss for this couple but half a million elderly men lead lonely lives"
• "Easy divorce 'has left elderly lonely and depressed'"
• "[A] significant contributing factor to low well-being in older people is the number of older people living alone."
Now, a sneak preview of what I found after digging deeper. Here's my favorite quote, not underscored in any headline:
"The association with an increased risk of Alzheimer's disease did not reach statistical significance." That's right, the effect was not really there!
One more, this one about those poor depressed people who are not coupled and perhaps living alone. Looking at the rates of problems such as depression and anxiety among 6 groups - men and women who are currently married, or divorced, or have always been single - the very lowest rate of these problems is in the group of women who have always been single (4%, compared to 12% for currently married women). That wasn't in any of the headlines, either.
More details to come. I just wanted to send you an early bunk warning.
On a related topic, if anyone is interested, I recently did an interview with the CBC's radio show, "Between You and Me," about living single. When the host posted it online, she said it was one of her favorite interviews of the season. You can listen to it here.
Also, I participated in a Bloggingheads TV conversation about single life, and the part of the discussion on discrimination against singles was posted online on the Opinion page of the New York Times on Monday and Tuesday of this week. You can watch it here.
