On Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Insight

The wisdom of shared stories

For the Some of Us

Everyone falls in life, but only some of us get back up

“What will your blog be about?” my patient Christine, a writer, had asked me recently. “Most blogs are about the writer or an aspect of their life or interests.”

I hadn’t given much thought to what I wanted to write about, having been more focused on why I wanted to write. In my office I reach only one person, one soul at a time. Through this blog my hope was to reach many more. Christine’s question helped me to consider how I wanted to do that.

In accepting the 2013 Oscar for best picture for Argo Ben Affleck had said, “…it doesn’t matter how you get knocked down in life because that’s going to happen. All that matters is you gotta get up.”

His words stayed with me, they reminded me of the Japanese quote I had shared with Christine when her book was turned down by the third publisher, ‘Fall down 7 times, stand up 8.’

“I guess I’ve got 4 more times to go,” she had said jokingly, choking on her words she added, “But I need to put it away for a bit. It’s too hard to look at it right now.” She had paused and reached for a tissue, but the tears in her eyes hadn’t seemed to cloud her vision, “Down the road, though, I’ll revise it and resubmit.”

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Life doesn’t spare any of us. It doesn’t matter if you are a movie star, a psychologist, or a writer, we all experience disappointment, heartbreak, discouragement, and despondence. We just need to get back up one more time than we are knocked down.

Christine has helped me to see that what I want to blog about are the things I have learned in life: about falling, about standing up, about healing, about growing, with the intention that my words might help you to get up, over and over again, when life knocks you down. Ernest Hemmingway once said, “Life breaks everyone of us, but some of us grow stronger in the broken places.” I hope in some small way what I write about helps you feel like you’re one of the “some of us.”

Dana S. Iyer, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist in private practice in Laguna Hills, California.

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