In the Name of Love

A Philosopher Looks at Our Deepest Emotions

Aaron Ben-Zeév is President and Professor of Philosophy at the University of Haifa. His books include: In the Name of Love: Romantic Ideology and its Victims. See full bio

October 10, 2008, Philosophy

Comments on "Will You Give Me Love In Return?"

Will You Give Me Love In Return?

By Aaron Ben-Zeév, Ph.D. on October 10, 2008 in In the Name of Love

The issue of reciprocity is central to love. Mutual attraction is for both sexes a most highly valued characteristic in a potential mate. The lover wants to be loved in return, to be kissed as well as to kiss. Read More

i strongly agree with you,

Submitted by farouk on October 11, 2008 - 4:15am.

i strongly agree with you, when some partners have fears of being abandoned or betrayed , usually the indifference reminds them of their fears thus causing lots of problems

unrequited love

Submitted by Lonesome Loser on January 21, 2009 - 11:00am.

Hi, I wanted to comment on unrequited love. Of course romantic love desires reciprocity, but does it require it? I believe unrequited love is simply romantic love that does not grow further. Most of us can't keep unrequited love up forever (thank God), but it seems the same set of emotions and motivations as reciprocated romantic love, at least at the outset. This would certainly include a perception by the would-be lover of connection or "goodness of fit," which may not be unfounded, it's just that the perception is not returned.

BTW, I really enjoy your postings, at least the ones I've come across so far. I believe your views on human nature are far more realistic and empathic than most "psychology" bloggers.