Approaching even serious issues in media and parenting with humor
Last night my husband Jay and I were laying in bed chatting about the day and playing another round of that previously untitled game we’ve been playing all throughout our relationship: “I can make you laugh.”
For my part, I tried to make Jay laugh by singing lyrics from the Grammy-award winning comedyteam Bret McKenzie and Jemaine Clement, otherwise known as the “Flight of the Conchords.” My chosen song of the evening was their homage to rap music called “Hiphopopotamus vs. Rhymenoceros.” One of my all-time favorite lyrics from that song is, “Some say my lyrics are sexist, but you lovely bitches and hoes should know I’m trying to correct this.”
Hilarious as those lyrics are all on their own, I imagine they’re particularly potent to my brain because I have done research on the way women (especially African American women) are demeaned by rappers and how young people feel about these characterizations. For example, I co-authored an article titled, “You’re My Bitch: Crude and Degrading Treatment of Women In Hardcore Rap Through the Eyes of the Predominantly White Target Audience.”
You might wonder how someone like me could laugh at a lyric that calls women “you lovely bitches and hoes.” Surely a feminist psychologist must curl her lips in disgust at the very thought of it. Actually, I particularly love that line because it shows the general understanding that women are often misrepresented in the genre. The songwriters’ use of the word “lovely,” their innocent, nerdy demeanor, and their irreverence combine to convey an astute understanding of the genres they parody. The end result is a subtle mockery of a social injustice married with a spot-on sense of humor that is irresistible and smart.
This all reminds me that in our current media-saturated culture, there are media delights to be found as well as troublesome content. When children are exposed regularly to images of young women in rap videos and lyrics that show a limited and unhealthy view, they are affected by what they see. When another media outlet, like the lyric from the Conchords, mocks that approach, kids also digest that information. We adults do too.
I went to school with a little boy named Patrick. I have an image of Patrick in my mind’s eye from when we were in about the second grade. Pat always brought his Star Wars action figures to class in a Tupperware container and played with them, making up imaginary battles and funny scenes. Recently, Pat and I found each other on Facebook. One of the first things we did was trade lyrics from the Flight of the Conchords. He and I had all the same favorites.
Now Pat and I both have sons of our own who are of the ages we were when we became friends. Our little boys are now playing with their own Star Wars action figures, imagining new scenes and scenarios. But our kids live in a different world than we did when it comes to media exposure. Back in the 1970s, we had five TV channels and they signed off at midnight. We didn’t have cell phones, the Internet, text messaging, Facebook, Twitter or any of the rest of the things our sons have at their disposal. We also weren’t plugged into mass media 45 hours a week like the average American child is today. The messages we received were mostly not as diverse, as readily available or as edgy as what our sons can access. We as adults are likewise exposed to different media than our parents were.
Parenting – and just living -- in today’s media rich environment demands that we acquire greater skills and knowledge about how media influence us. There are both challenges and opportunities in the realm of mass media both for us and for our kids. I focus on some of these issues in Chapter 2 of my book How Fantasy Becomes Reality: Seeing Through Media Influence. I will write more about these in the upcoming weeks on this blog as well.
My bottom line for now is that some really cool media exist for both parents and kids, but there are new rules for what it takes to be a media savvy citizen. Stay tuned for more. For all these things, a sense of humor is not absolutely required, but it sure does help.
Bibliography:
Burgess, M. C. R., Dill, K. E., & Wright, B. A. (2009). You’re my bitch: Crude and degrading treatment of women in hardcore rap through the eyes of the predominantly White target audience, Journal of Current Issues in Media and Telecommunications, 1, 3/4, available from: https://www.novapublishers.com/catalog/product_info.php?products_...
Dill, K. E. (in press). When Fantasy Becomes Reality: The Social Psychology of the Mass Media. New York: Oxford University Press. Available from oup.com and from http://tinyurl.com/kdfantasyreality
