How To Do Life

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Mom, Thanks for My Wife

A bad role model can teach you a lot. Read More

beautiful story, thank you

beautiful story, thank you for sharing

Insightful

Motivating note. Really good.

Your mom sounds a bit like my mom

Although mine was never outside being social... she liked to stay home and keep every details under control, which means we were in her way.

Sometimes, I mention it to my friends. Some say: you're an adult, you can't blame your situation on your mom your entire life. Eh, just because I don't have contact doesn't mean I'm angry with her. I just don't have time to spend being criticized for how I breathe, if I talked to much, not enough or both, etc. Plus I am a women and she didn't want a girl... no matter what I do, I can never change that one.

If you tell someone my mom didn't love me, they think you're complaining, exaggerating, etc. It doesn't matter how matter of fact your tone is. To others, it always seem like the most awful thing. Yet, is exists and it is not the end of the world. The hard part is when you want it to be different than what it is. Then you hit the wall of deception over and over again.

I think mom has help make me very strong and independent. It's because of her that I have the stamina and the focus necessary to succeed, and I don't mean just in the business sense, but also on the personal side. Her rules didn't make sense, so I had to develop my own. I have a pretty good sense of who I am and of where my intrinsic motivations lie. When bad luck happens, I can find my own way out of the dark and into the light, in a pretty short period of time.

Resilience

I found it vital to honestly assess and assimilate my extremely grim childhood experiences (recounted in my website "seeking bedrock") but to realize that using them for an excuse would simply be stupid, because I'd be where I was stuck, with a good excuse! But I am not stupid. So.

Is the common admonition not

Is the common admonition not to "blame" our parents for our problems really an admonition not to use their effect on us as an excuse not to do something about it? After all, it is inarguable that our parents profoundly shape us, their kids, and I've never quite understood what "blame" in this context meant.

Graphomania

I can see why you prefer anonymity.

Hey everyone, Jim MacAfee is

Hey everyone, Jim MacAfee is not smart or able to contribute anything of value to this topic. Avoid Jim Macafee and his ineptitude at all costs.

I doubt that a recommendation

I doubt that a recommendation by someone hiding behind the bush of anonymity carries any weight at all. But keep coming back. Toying with you is fun.

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Marty Nemko is a career and personal coach based in Oakland, Ca. and the author of 7 books. 
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