I belive that long lasting health behavior change is best built on a foundation of self-compassion and self-acceptance. When I give talks on weight management, I always get the same question, some flavor of, "If we teach people how to accept themselves, then why would they want to lose weight?" It's a reasonable logical conclusion, but misguided. So let's talk about acceptance and change.
Acceptance, from my standpoint, means treating yourself as valid and whole. Taking yourself as is and acknowledging that you are of worth and can pursue things that matter in your life. That is an inherently self-compassionate standpoint. The focus is specifically on accepting one's thoughts, memories, feelings, and bodily sensations. These experiences are largely out of our control. They are products of our history and the current context (what's happening around us right now). Saying it is "OK" to think what you think, and feel what you feel, when you think and feel it, is acceptance.
Ironically, this is a very powerful place from which to make important behavioral changes.
We all have core values, like caring for and connecting with loved ones, learning and growing, engaging in pleasant and nourishing activities, just to name a few. Often what gets in the way of us pursuing these core values are unwanted or difficult thoughts, feelings, memories, and bodily sensations. It may be hard to pursue intimacy because we have been hurt in the past, remember that pain, and have anxiety about being hurt in the future. Pursuing intimacy with someone means opening up to that pain, it might mean remembering past hurts, feeling that anxiety, and still moving towards intimacy despite being scared. This is an act of courage and it requires acceptance. Acceptance that what you feel and think is valid, OK, and does NOT need to be changed before you move in your valued direction (in this case, towards intimacy). So the very stance of acceptance towards what is happening inside you is what can propel you to powerful change with your behavior.