Focus on Forgiveness

Forgiveness and its connection to anxiety, depression, and overall health and happiness.

by Matthew B. James, Ph.D.

Aloha Awareness

With spring here and summer on the way, being outdoors alone or with loved ones is a great way to practice increasing your awareness and become more pono in the process. Read More

Unplug the TV and Plug Into Aloha!

How much time is yours, and how much is owned by your TV? What could you have done last year with another 11 weeks? Could you have gotten a book written, or gone on vacation? Is TV an excuse, or not? Think about it. Read More

Rethinking Spirituality

The terms spiritual and spirituality have taken on some new meanings in recent times. The words have been associated with many different things. These associations are positive and negative, good and bad, happy and sad. And for many, none of these labels apply. The problem is not with the label of spirituality itself, but rather the associations that so many have made. Read More

Makia and Love

In the same way that the New Year reminds us to make new goals for ourselves, perhaps the spring equinox is an annual reminder to examine our relationships, for the seeds we plant now will be the harvest we reap. Read More

Jealous? It's Time to Take Action

Did you see this headline the other day about how people who are madly in love are more likely to put down and even act aggressively toward appealing members of their own sex they see as rivals? It turns out we are all susceptible to jealousy, a scary thought with Valentine's Day just around the corner and people getting ready to celebrate passionate love! Read More

Taking Action in the New Year

Aloha and Happy New Year! In this post I want to discuss two ideas: the health value of forgiveness, and the importance of flexibility and creativity in meeting your goals. Let's start with goals, since it is the New Year and lots of you, like me, are probably working out and trying to eat right to meet your fitness goals. Read More

Sleep, Cycles and Rebooting Your Brain with Meditation

Did you hear about the new brain imaging study by researchers at Yale University? It showed that people who meditate regularly are able to switch off parts of the brain associated with anxiety, schizophrenia, attention deficit, and hyperactivity disorder and other problems. Read More

Holiday Giving

As you are making your gift lists and busily shopping for Christmas or other holidays your family celebrates in December, think about what it means to be generous. Huna, the ancient Hawaiian understanding of life, teaches that being generous flows out of our sense of being "pono" - right with ourselves and others. Read More

Forgiveness and Thanksgiving

With Thanksgiving, Christmas and other holidays coming up, I thought this would be a good time to talk about the importance of forgiving family members. Read More

Emotional Cleansing and Release

Growing up, you may have been taught that you can't let go of certain issues or emotions quickly. The good news is you can change that belief and experience greater peace and physical, mental and spiritual health as you learn to release unforgiveness. Read More

Creating the Life You Want Step 2: Letting Go of Limiting Beliefs

The discipline in psychology called PNI (psychoneuroimmunology) focuses on studying how specific stressors affect specific areas of the body. Psychological studies have shown that certain emotions have more impact on the heart, for example. Read More

Creating The Life You Want - Step 1: Release the Negative

I learned so much from my grandfather. Both my mother and I experienced my grandfather as a very forgiving person who would let go of any negative emotion as soon as it happened. Have you ever known someone like that? Or known the opposite? Which one do you want to be? Read More

Hawaiian Forgiveness and the Three Transgressions

The Hawaiian concept of forgiveness is different from how forgiveness is approached in Western culture. First, in Huna, forgiveness is not complete until there is a complete letting go or release of the issue. One of my teachers, Etua Lopes, Kumu Hula (teacher of Hula), always says, "You forgive. You forget the incident. You remember only the learning. Read More

The Hawaiian Secret of Forgiveness

When it comes to learning to forgive others, it turns out we can learn a lot from ancient indigenous people such as those who inhabited Hawai'i before the coming of westerners. They understood on a gut level that to harbor resentment against others hurts the person who refuses to forgive. Read More

Cutting the Aka Connection II

In response to the last post I was asked about whether two people can forgive each other nonverbally, without actually talking about what happened between them. I replied that since most of our communication is non-verbal, it is a definite sign that forgiveness is taking place when both people begin to act in a way that presupposes forgiveness. Read More

Pono and the Aka Connection

It's springtime and in many parts of the world the new growth of plants and flowers is pushing up through the old dried out leaves, stalks and debris from the last growing season. Just as the Earth is reborn each spring, we can experience fresh new growth in our relationships by clearing out the old baggage of how we perceive others that tends to accumulate over time. Read More

Pono and Ho’oponopono, Part 2

In my last blog post I talked about the Hawaiian concepts of Pono, of being right with yourself, and Ho'oponopono, the forgiveness technique that literally means to make something doubly right, and how they relate to each other. In other words, our ability to fully forgive others and release negative feelings flows out of our sense of congruency, peace, purpose - Pono. Read More

Pono and Ho’oponopono, Part 1

So many people are struggling with economic conditions, their health or personal losses. My heart goes out to everyone facing such struggles. Yet we are fortunate to live in a time when we can tap into powerful, validated concepts for personal empowerment and healing. Read More