Standing on line at my local coffee shop, a gentleman, turns to me and says, "What's with people in New Jersey blowing their horns the second the light changes?" His gentle drawl pointed his place of origin as somewhere south of the Mason Dixon line. I smiled, shaking my head, "I wish I knew-people are so impatient, it's crazy!"
Shaking his head, he smiled, "I don't get why people are in such a hurry?"
"Fear, I suppose," I replied, "of being late, of wanting to be first, of missing something, or losing control. I would expect it's just misplaced frustration; sad really."
"Yup, it sure does seem silly to me."
"I sure is, it seems we have lost our grounding. A client of mine, a retired pediatrician, once said to me after I asked how she was doing, flared her elbows out to each side and told me that every day she wakes up and doesn't feel wood-it's a good day."
The southern gentleman responded with a burst of laughter, imitating the flailing elbows and thanked me, "I'll remember that!" Laughing as he took his beverage.
The truth is, many of us have forgotten to be grateful for life and the opportunities that are presented to us each day. We have mistaken the concept of enough vs. more. We have gotten so caught up in the frenzy that we have made life a battle, rather than a dance and look at money as the prize-rather than a means to achieve a sense of peace.
The fact is, one day, we will all flail our elbows out to the side and guess what? There will be wood and all the horn blowing, craziness and insanity will have been for nothing. The dance of life involves living to one's values and leaving something of meaning behind; a legacy of creating something better, helping others and improving or preserving the good stuff. Money comes and goes; it buys stuff that too quickly has no value; another pair of shoes, shirt, gadget or a week sitting on a beach somewhere. The gifts we are given are vast, if we slow down enough to think about it and build our lives around those values.
Begin by aligning your money life with your values and making decisions that benefit you and those your love over the long term. Here are a few thoughts to begin your process:
1. Save ten dollars for every dollar you spend on something frivolous.
2. Make sure you always consider a "plan B" should "plan A" not work out as you might expect.
3. Set your expectations low when it comes to increased revenue or decreased expenses; in other words, be conservative
4. Firmly set your goals based on what's most important in your life and then make whatever changes necessary to accomplish the objectives.
Our lives don't need to be an endless cycle of road-rage and hurry infused with anger and frustration; it can be filled with wonder, gratitude and a sense of purpose based on our values and what is most important in our lives. It takes time, patience, care and without knocking wood, a little bit of luck.
