Evolution of the Self

It’s intriguing—if not downright mystifying—how a woman’s mind and body, sexually speaking, can be at war with one another. It’s doubtless true that, however indiscriminately, Nature wants babies. But women require that many conditions be met before they’re actually ready to give in to their powerful mating instincts. Read More

The findings of neuroscientific research on the nature and origins of our erotic interests aren't always intuitive. In fact, there's a good chance that major gaps exist in your understanding of where your sexual preferences really come from. Some of them may have puzzled you all along. Read More

What are the subconscious motives that drive a woman to become an ardent "fan"—or even wife—of a mass murderer? In this post I'll delve into the biological, sexual, and psychological dynamics that best explain such aberrant behavior. Read More

Out of context, such a question might sound strange—or possibly stupid. After all, if we're not responsible for our brain and what it tells us to do, who would be? But, on the other hand, what if, because of TBI and PTSD, we suffer a psychotic break? Read More

Your "sweet spot" is something like your very own golden mean. It's about doing, or not doing, that which in any particular situation is optimal for you. And knowing what's, personally, "just right" is hardly a trait you're born with. Nor is it a matter of intuition... Read More

Of the dozen suggestions in this post for feeling perpetually young, Part 1 took up the first four, and Part 2 elaborated on an additional four. Here I'll expand on four final ways to stay young in mind, regardless of age. Read More

"I'm a teenager trapped in an old body." ~ Betty White What if eternal youth had essentially nothing to do with looks? Or vigor, stamina, endurance? Or, for that matter, ignorance or naivete—which, after all, are "outgrown" by maturity? . . . Read More

Examples of self-disciplined behaviors seriously interfering with personal pleasure and excitement are virtually infinite. Comfort, amusement, delight, adventure, entertainment, titillation--you name it--focusing on what, ultimately, will best serve your interests involves all sorts of sacrifices. . . . Read More

To the extent that Halloween revolves around an emotion, there's no question but that emotion is fear. After all, the most compelling creatures of the day (or night!) are monsters. And these bloodcurdling ogres represent either the freakish dead--such as mummies, skeletons, and ghosts--or the ghoulishly undead--like zombies and vampires. . . . Read More

‭When criticized, narcissists show themselves woefully incapable of retaining any emotional poise, or receptivity. And it really doesn't much matter whether the nature of that criticism is constructive or destructive. . . . Read More

Whenever I see something on reverse psychology, I'm compelled to review it. After all, I once published a comprehensive therapist's guidebook called Paradoxical Strategies in Psychotherapy. So when I first read Jim Afremow's PT post, I thought it must be some sort of (ill-timed) April Fools' joke. . . . Read More

Revisiting bygone times to "revision" them differs dramatically from simply dwelling on them. For the process of revisioning the past is mostly about reperceiving it in a way that helps correct present deficiencies in your self-image. Read More

No question but that the whole notion of selfishness is devoid of positive connotation. Arguing that it warrants being viewed as virtuous (as does Ayn Rand) is, finally, about as convincing as Gordon Gekko's egomaniacal affirmation that "greed is good." Read More

In response to feeling emotionally disconnected from their primary caregiver, a baby's psychological defense mechanisms relate mostly to their efforts to protect themselves from the painful sting of rejection. Read More