Verified by 
Central to every relationship is communication, and genuine communication relies on listening. Not just listening to the words that are spoken, but listening wholeheartedly to every aspect of the conversation taking place.
With this in mind, as we race headlong into the season of what can only be termed rampant consumerism, O. Henry’s short story “The Gift of the Magi” comes to mind. A young couple of little means each has a single prized possession: she, her hair and he, a pocket watch. He ventures out and sells his pocket watch to buy her combs for her beautiful tresses, while she cuts and sells her hair to buy him a chain for his pocket watch.
Although the moment each discovers the others’ sacrifice may be a moment of true love, every moment before it is one of true listening. Not only do those moment harken us back to the spirit of the upcoming holiday season, where our gifts to one another can be a reflection of genuine human connection, but also reminds us that it’s not the gift that counts, so much as the intention behind it. That intention draws upon our willingness to give of ourselves, which is less about a momentary gesture of charity or largess, and more about making ourselves mindfully available to one another every day.
It’s no secret that we are awash in a sea of objects, but, in the end, the only thing we really have to give to one another is our love and compassion. Wholehearted listening, along with the gestures it inspires, reclaims us from that sea in which we are adrift and sets us upon a course toward something considerably more authentic.
Now, all this is not to say that we should refrain from plundering the depths of the big box stores, or patronizing our local merchants. What it does suggest is that we should do so with a mindful intention that is a reflection of our authentic human connection, not simply lip service to the “shoulds” we attach to the holiday gift giving season.
An authentic gesture, like the one we find in O. Henry’s tale, is one full of meaning and purpose; it’s not simply a gesture for its own sake. Moreover, it is heart-felt and wholehearted, expressing the depth of our relationship to those around us and reinforcing the value of those relationships. In making ourselves available to that depth, listening carefully and giving lovingly, we will find ourselves connected to the true spirit of the season.
© 2014 Michael J. Formica, All Rights Reserved
Contact Michael for counseling, coaching or consultation locally or nationally via telephone, or Internet
Receive email alerts for Enlightened Living
Subscribe to Michael’s website for news and updates
