"Every moment that we spend in the world, others have the opportunity to share in the gift of us."

Glad it "stuck" with you.

I should admit error though.. I said, "when you leave your house..."
Clearly I was mistaken as you share your gifts with people via your desk at home, every time you write into cyberspace.

Peace,
C

Then to add to the complexity of why we show up late: some cultures are much more about living in the moment. I noticed this was the norm in Peru while there for 4.5 months this year. It wasn't a disregard to the other person or low opinion of themself, but rather something to be expected.

This subject of chronic tardiness means so much to me. And I would like to know how I can cure myself. I am late most of the time. I am late at least 3 - 4 hours to work every day, but then I work over time until late at night. It's been like this for years, and it's getting even worse lately. My managers know me for many years now. They don't complain anymore. But I know that they are not happy with this. And I am very unhappy as well and even sometimes depressed, not just because of this but because of a million other things all related to (I guess) the lack of self-worth.
Also the idea of being not present is so true. It may take me 2-3 hours to get ready for work in the morning. I don't know how time flies by. But I know that while doing ANYTHING, I think or dream of a million other things that had happened and will or I wish would happen in the future.
I also feel I don't want to get up in the morning. It's like NOTHING in the whole world is as important as sleeping some more, even if this is hurting me in many ways. It seems like I just don't care if I'm hurting myself as long as I get my sleep. And every single time that I decide the evening before that I will make a new start the next morning, I am either so excited to get started or make myself busy with so many things that I go to sleep very late at night, and hence I can't wake up early the next morning.
But it's absolutely not about imposing my importance to others. I am not at all arrogant. In fact, I'm quite the oppposite. I hate arrogance, and I try all my best to be extremely modest, so modest that people take me for granted until they get to know me better.
So by being chronically late in the morning, I am not trying to be noticeable or show my importance. On the contrary, I don't like the idea of being noticed. Many times my managers praise me for my work, I either don't believe them, or I say they don't really know what they're saying. I don't understand why they praised my work so much because I would see it as very ordinary, and I ALWAYS feel I could have done much better if only I had more time.
Of course, you would know by now that I also suffer from procrastination. I am also (I guess) a perfectionist in every aspect of my life, although I'm very far from being perfect.
I also suffered from depression for a long time. But I'm out of it now.
People who would read this would think my life is a real mess. Actually, I eventually manage to make everything right for others. I work extra hours to compensate my feeling of guilt, I work on weekends, holidays, ... I also respect other people's time. When it comes to affecting negatively someone's time, I do the effort and get there on time. I'm hurting only myself. I cannot take hurting others, but it's ok to hurt myself. I can take that.
I know I wrote too much. But I think all these different issues are interrelated and I really need a help in this.
I don't want to get to the end of my life and say I could have lived a better life if I only had more time.

This subject of chronic tardiness means so much to me. And I would like to know how I can cure myself from it. I am late most of the time. I am late at least 3 - 4 hours to work every day, although I work over time until late at night. It's been like this for years, and it's getting even worse lately. My managers know me for many years now, they don't complain anymore. But I know that they are not happy with this. And I am very unhappy as well and even sometimes depressed, not just because of this but because of a million other things all related to (I guess) the lack of self-worth.
Also the idea of being not present is so true. It may take me 2-3 hours to get ready for work in the morning. I don't know how time flies by. But I know that while doing ANYTHING, I think or dream of a million other things that had happened and will or I wish would happen in the future.
I also feel I don't want to get up in the morning. It's like NOTHING in the whole world is as important as sleeping some more, even if this is hurting me in many ways. It seems like I just don't care if I'm hurting myself as long as I get my sleep. And every single time that I decide the evening before that I will make a new start the next morning, I am either so excited to get started or make myself busy with so many things that I go to sleep very late at night, and hence I can't wake up early the next morning.
But it's absolutely not about imposing my importance to others. I am not at all arrogant. In fact, I'm quite the oppposite. I hate arrogance, and I try all my best to be extremely modest, so modest that people take me for granted until they get to know me better.
So by being chronically late in the morning, I am not trying to be noticeable or show my importance. On the contrary, I don't like the idea of being noticed. Many times my managers praise me for my work, I either don't believe them, or I say they don't really know what they're saying. I don't understand why they praised my work so much because I would see it as very ordinary, and I ALWAYS feel I could have done much better if only I had more time.
Of course, you would know by now that I also suffer from procrastination. I am also (I guess) a perfectionist in every aspect of my life, although I'm very far from being perfect.
I also suffered from depression for a long time. But I'm out of it now.
People who would read this would think my life is a real mess. Actually, I eventually manage to make everything right for others. I work extra hours to compensate my feeling of guilt, I work on weekends, holidays, ... I also respect other people's time. When it comes to affecting negatively someone's time, I do the effort and get there on time. I'm hurting only myself. I cannot take hurting others, but it's ok to hurt myself. I can take that.
I know I wrote too much. But I think all these different issues are interrelated and I really need a help in this.
I don't want to get to the end of my life and say I could have lived a better life if I only had more time.

at home. What could that mean? ;)

And, I am sometimes late. Not always, but sometimes. I'm not sure it that poor time management and procrastination doesn't play a part, too, along with possibly feeling unimportant.

Maybe there are reasons for feeling unimportant in certain circumstances, if that is what's behind tardiness.

For instance, when I was in a particular relationship in recent years, where I felt unimportant to my partner (that's putting it mildly - he was verbally/emotionally abusive), I'd be late for our engagements or dates quite often.

Of course he complained and I subsequently got much better at being on time. He still complained about when I'd done it in the past though. That is he continued with verbal jabs about it all the time, even though I had stopped doing it and began arriving on time.

And, when I began to arrive on time, I'd end up spending 30 minutes waiting on HIM because he was late getting ready himself. If I mentioned to him about his being late himself, I'd just get comments about all the times in the past when I'd been late.

There was no reprieve no matter what - no winning with the situation. I'm certainly glad to be out of it. Maybe there were elements of feeling unimportant, or wanting attention or control there. I can see where that might have been possible.

And, I haven't been late for engagements, or dates since, though I am sometimes late for meetings at work. Maybe that's because I feel unimportant or want attention or control there sometimes too? Hmm..have to think about that. I'd assumed it was poor time management (or sometimes - forgetfulness).

Darn it. Now you've got me thinking. . .

I would love to hear more about this "take" on any behaviour that doesn't seem to serve our lives.

You said, "A person who is chronically late is superficially motivated by the misplaced notion that s/he, his/her needs and his/her interests are somehow more important than the people to whom s/he is responsible. What actually underlies this sentiment is a subtle and much more pernicious sense of just the opposite."

So... a lack of sense of personal value leads to an outward behaviour that looks like an inflated sense of personal value to others.

So, in order to empathise with others in regard to any range of persistent, and seemingly painful behaviours, we need to take our "judgment" of what they are doing and flip it around.

eg. for someone who consistently says 'don't worry about me, I don't mind, I have no preferences etc" what woud you say?

or for someone who says "I feel left out, ignored when you didn't call or let me know is going on?"

I would love to hear more on this! It might really help me empathise with some behaviours of mine I don't enjoy and some behaviours of others I find frustrating and painful.

I know I get extremely annoyed at this myself, but I usually show up to a class (first of the day, usually) about a minute to perhaps three or five minutes late and perhaps a few times per month I'll actually show up five minutes early or on time. I knew I was usually that much late less than two years ago and my then college Chinese teacher, being an advocate on promptness, gets extremely annoyed at this. I know I try to be on time, but for some reason, there are always other things that distract me that prevents me from leaving early in order for me to get to class on time. I still do this now. I know the fact that most of the things I do at home on a computer I can do on a school computer. I reasoned this for myself to force myself to get to school an hour or two early so I could do the very same things, but is that my source of motivation to get there early? No, it isn't, and it still isn't. It's still pretty much a new year and school's already been started for about three weeks now and I still haven't reached my New Year's resolution to consistently get to school at eight or nine when the computer labs open. I plan to do this because of my sanity: I find it really exhausting trying to "speed and power" cycle up two blocks of hills from home, shortcut through a parallel path to a busy street, cycle up through some more hills before reaching a halfway point where the rest is all downhill or nearly flat. It just takes a toll on my esophagus when I breathe too heavily after an attempt to "speed" up a hill. If I can somehow manage that on my own, it'll be a miracle and I wouldn't need to suffer constant tardiness... it's now just a matter of time of pulling my eyes away from a computer.