Emotional Connection

Sharpen your emotional intelligence and increase your present moment awareness.
Raphael Cushnir (author of The One Thing Holding You Back) is a leader in the world of emotional intelligence and present moment awareness, offering lectures and seminars worldwide. See full bio

Unleashing the Power of Emotional Connection

Using Emotional Connection, author Raphael Cushnir rewires your brain.

RC: Our current economic crisis, at root, is an emotional problem. Clearly, we have been seduced into living beyond our means for way too long. But what made us so susceptible? The answer is our resistance the feeling of lack that I described earlier. We've lost the ability to want things without being able to have them.

If we continue to resist the emotion of lack collectively, any economic fix will prove to be temporary and unsustainable. Learning to surf our lack, on the other hand, will enable us to see the future clearly and to act wisely.

Here's a small but broadly applicable example. I want a new car. My old one is dented and dirty and doesn't have any of the cool stuff like GPS. I see lots of commercials for new models with all the bells and whistles. I cringe inside at being left behind, and start wondering if I could find a way to afford the higher payments.

But then I catch myself - I've been thinking before feeling - and notice the tightness in my chest. I surf it for a few moments and it becomes a big wave of lack. I feel like stomping my feet, throwing a huge fit. "Gimme! Gimme!" I surf this tantrum for another few moments, watching many memories of similar deprivations and tantrums float by.

Gradually, the storm inside me begins to settle. The lack is gone. In its wake I can easily recognize many reasons why a new car, right now, isn't in my best interest. And better yet, I'm at peace with it.

Q: If a sustainable future means I won't get to have what I want, what'll be left?

In a sustainable future you'll still be able to have lots of things you want. But more important, you'll also be able to distinguish and let go of those wants that are part of the addictive cycle. Freed from that cycle, you'll have more time and energy for what really matters - relationships with loved ones, meaningful work, and the abiding joy that only comes from a life of passionate emotional connection.



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