Don't Try Harder, Try Different!

Simple strategies for handling anxiety and stress.

by Patrick B. McGrath, Ph.D.

Three Things That Maintain Anxiety

How many times have you had the same conversation with someone over and over again, and then became frustrated again and again because they did not follow your advice? I hear about this happening all of the time actually. I hear about it from therapists that I train who tell me how frustrating it is to work with anxious patients. Read More

Do Something That Scares You

I have a sign up in my office that says, "Do one thing every day that scares you." It is inspiring to my patients and lets them know that the goal of our work together will not be for me to talk them out of being anxious, but for them to behave themselves out of being anxious. Read More

Growing Stress Free in the Office

I wanted to say thanks to Brian Jenkins for sending this article to me. I appreciate hearing from others how stress might be managed and the following is one easy way to start to work on stress in the workplace. I'll be back with another article soon. Patrick.

Why Office Gardening is a Great Hobby For Busy Professionals Read More

Parenting Tips

Parent tip 101.

I have been fortunate enough to have been witness to several great examples of parenting. I will write about them from time to time. Read More

Silence Can Be Golden

Silence: Read More

Living Neutral

So, we left off with perception. This is usually where people try to challenge me. They try to tell me that there really are things that are anxiety provoking. They might say that having a gun pointed in your face is anxiety provoking for anyone. But, that is not really true. If you do not know what a gun is, then you may not be scared at all. Read More

Perceptions of Neutrality

Anxiety is not the fear of a thing, it is the fear of the way you think about a thing. Read More

You Are Unique, Not Special

Now comes time for my favorite Don't Try Harder, Try Different topic: Specialness. Specialness is all about the idea that somehow the rules of the world apply to me differently than they apply to everyone else. Read More

Possibility Versus Probability

We need to do a quick lesson on possibility versus probability to tie up our worry section. Just because something is possible, does not mean that it is highly probable. Often, possibility and probability are confused with each other. Many times people see that the mere chance of something happening must mean that it absolutely will happen. This is, of course, not true at all. Read More

Control is an Illusion Part 2

Ok, so worries do not make things happen. SO, maybe they serve this purpose: Maybe worries work by having us think of every bad thing that might happen. If we can do that, then we can prepare for every bad thing that might happen. And, if we are prepared for every bad thing that might happen, then we will not need to worry about it anymore since we are ready for it. Read More

Control Is an Illusion Part 1

Control is an illusion. There, I said it. Accept it and move on. You are not in total control of anything at all. You can have some control of some things, but total control is not achievable. Take these examples - you are not in total control of your own mind. Read More

Practice Does Not Make Perfect

Practicing these Don't Try Harder suggestions will not mean that you will become perfect at them, because practice does not make perfect. Do you doubt this? Then name one thing that you have practiced and are now perfect at doing - by that I mean name one thing that you have done that all of the other 7 billion people on the planet have looked at and agreed that it is perfect. Read More

Can't Versus Won't

OK, hopefully you have stopped shoulding all over the place, and now it is time to start to work on another typical stress related word - CAN'T. People like to use the word can't a lot. It is just an easy word to use. We say "I can't talk on the phone," even though we have to actually talk to say that (think about that one for a while). Read More

Time to Try Different!

OK, now it is time to start to make those behavior changes. Starting with your lowest level fear your job is to do that thing. But, how do you just go and do that thing? Well, that is where Don't Try Harder, Try Different comes into play. Read More

More steps

OK, we introduced the idea of trying something different, and now we need to get to the "how" part of that. Here is your assignment for all of you who are ready to try some stress reducing exercises. Read More

Are you Trying Different?

Are you Different yet? Read More

Trying Different, Step 1

I often talk to my patients about something that I have found to be very important; that is the concept of Don't Try Harder, Try Different. Many people are stuck doing the same thing over and over again, hoping that the next time they try, if they just try a bit harder, all will be well. Read More

Greetings and Welcome to my Blog.

Thank you for checking in to this blog. I am really excited about interacting with all of you about a topic that is a favorite of mine - stress and anxiety. If you are checking in to this blog, there is a good chance that you are experiencing some anxiety and stress. Read More

Patrick McGrath, Ph.D., is the Director of the Alexian Brothers Behavioral Health Hospital's Center for Anxiety and OCD Program, president of Anxiety Centers of Illinois, and president of the OCD-Midwest.

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