Awesome blog. I think that facebook does distract us from more important tasks in life but I wonder if it is because we intentionally don't want to perform those undertakings. My question is this - are we looking at procrastination or do some people really want to tackle tasks but are drawn to facebook out of addiction (as you pointed out)?
Or alternatively is this a new form a social acceptance or even competition? Perhaps the reasons are tailored to each individual.

Hi,
I think Facebook and other immediately rewarding online tools work both ways as you note. We are looking for an alternative activity from what we're doing, and online tools are particularly seductive because they are literally right at our fingertips. That said, once we begin to use these tools, they can become addictive, as we constantly update our status or add new pictures or check out someone else. So many people with whom I speak directly identify the addictive qualities of the medium and their own addictive tendencies. As the one student noted in the quotes above, "I will have cravings and urges to check it after a night out, like an addiction. I have even taken time away from hanging out with people to go check my account, and it is always in the back of my mind." This is a little scary, I think.

Of course, the reasons are tailored to each individual as you note, and like alcohol or other substances, there may be some notion of "responsible use," but I think that many people simply become addicted to the medium and waste much of their lives in cyberspace ;-)

tim

I definitely think it is used for procrastination purposes - I actually only check out Facebook at work, usually when I need a break from working, am frustrated with a problem at work and need a diversion. When I'm home, I rarely if ever use Facebook, or the computer, for that matter. It's easy to access at work in an office environment, since you're on the computer anyway, with easy access to the Internet.

Thanks for the input. Can you explain what you mean when you say "need a break" or a "diversion"?I understand the frustrated part, as it's an emotion. Are these other two related to emotions too?
tim

I never really got into Facebook because I realized that many of my friends seemed to be revolving their lives around it, and I thought that was scary. For example, anytime I would hang out with these Facebook addicts they needed to take pictures to post. The question in my mind was: are you here in the moment, or are you just preforming this moment, and the real focus in your life is Facebook? Although this is a bit of an extremist way of looking at it, my point is that Facebook can be a heavily entrenched part of people's lives.

You hit the nail on the head here, I think. There are lots of Facebook addicts out there. Folks who constantly update their status, upload pictures of every event as you noted, and simply feel drawn to the computer over the moment. I think it is terribly problematic as a self-regulatory problem.

I completely agree with kh. I know certain people who spend so much time taking pictures for facebook. and i must what an interesting blog. I do feel like I do certain tasks (such as Facebook) only to procrastinate and don't do them other wise. I do when I had this paper due I kept on thinking that I have a million things to do and kept founding ways to delay doing the paper and in fact I like found a point in doing those well mindless tasks but when my spring break started and I no longer had work. I honestly didn't understand what to do and I the things I did to procrastinate my paper seemed pointless now. It's like it was fun doing them when I was procrastinating but not otherwise.

Tim,
Why don't you start a Facebook group? It sounds like you'd be feeding the beast, but maybe if you reminded people in the midst of their Facebook activities that they're procrastinating around something more important than updating their status, they'd sign out a little bit sooner. Or if they're procrastinating on Facebook, they might as well learn of resources that might help them curb their procrastination habit. I'd definitely join.

Also, you should definitely keep up the podcasts!

It's really important making a difference between having fun and becoming an addict. It't ok if you want to find a lot of friends all over the world but it's really a problem if you substitute normal social communication outdoor with the communication with your monitor in the lonelyness of your room. If you start leaving pieces of food on your desk because you became so addicted that you can't stand up and go out to have a lunch with real, breathing people, it can become a real problem and it can affect on all aspects of your life. We can't undervalue the importance of the texture of the verbal and nonverbal communication that we have in every normal social meeting and which is being lost in this kind of communication. It's fun, but only if you are noticing the difference. BIG SALUTATION FROM SERBIA!!!

...and narcissism is out of control. "Look at Me, Look what I'm doing!" This is not Social Networking, this is Self Absorption with a lack of connecting with others. Does anyone really care about these stupid "Status" updates? "John Doe is driving from San Fran to LA" Why do so many people need to broadcast this crap? Why do sooo many people want aspects of their personal lives to be accessible by hundreds of millions of strangers? Why are birthday wishes no longer expressed by meaningful efforts of reachin out? Cards, phone calls.... now they are reduced to a comment on someone's wall. Perhaps it means more to get wall comments by their 239 online "friends". Do people really have that many friends? Would all of those friends be there for them in a moment of need?

I will NEVER have a personal social networking account. I choose to connect with people on an interpersonal level.

Plus.... Txt messaging... sure it has it's purpose at times but when I am out to dinner and I see people constantly texting at the table, it's completely innapropriate. When I am with people in various situations and they are constantly texting, I will get up and walk away. I am giving them my time to be present and if they can't be present as well, then I leave.

True story: I was playing volleyball at the beach and this one guy on my team was texting during the game. I walked away and joined another game. He obviously thought the other 11 people should wait for him throughout the game, instead of just sitting out and taking care of his texting. Like I said... self absorbed.

I think I'm addicted! I have set a new boundary that'll I'll only check after work but we'll see how long I can make that last! I just blogged about this myself recently. Glad to see I'm not alone.

Is there a sense to comment firsts blog entries? I mean: will somebody read this comments? :) or not :)

At my sister's constant suggestion, I finally, semi-reluctantly, joined Facebook. The emotional rollercoaster of a marriage with the site lasted exactly 48 hours. I set up my profile in a very unpretentious way. No pic of me in shades and a t-shirt with something cool on it but instead my choice of pic being one of me posing with backpack over my shoulders first day of 3rd grade circa 1979. It got some laughs and an 'oh you look so cute' response. Was all good and funny. Also upon listing my favorite movies I listed very many including ones who I knew would raise eyebrows and generate some laughs. But in the end, there always is SOME ego in setting up a profile and me basically showing off my wide range in musical taste a la John Cusack/High Fidelity by practially putting my entire CD collection under 'favorite music' is the perfect example.

Had some fun with the site at first starting off friending my sister of course, then a couple of her friends, then a few of my friends, relatives, excoworkers, etc. I made it up to about 15 friends (no quotes around that word) by the time I bailed. Facebook is definitely a strange, surreal, addictive site. Perhaps only for those who can still maintain a real social life OFFline (and my sister DOES have a life offline). With ME, however (and having quite an addictive streak to begin with) I already was seeing myself lured into this site's 'tractor-beam' mind you. When I was out, when I was at work, I would always be thinking hard about who may have found and 'friended' me or put something on my wall or responded to something on my wall. Was so wishing I had internet on my cell which thank God I DON'T have. Even at home I found myself running into my room (computer) during a commercial while watching TV and knowing the show was back on yet still waiting a minute or so to return to the living room. I even on two occasions during this very brief stint turned my computer off only to turn it back on a half an hour later 'just to see'.

And then there's the whole psychological aspect of this site that resembles a distorted, mutated version of an elementary, middle, high school, and every other phase of your life reunion all rolled into one injected with steroids. And what I didn't even mention yet was all those people (and there ARE a lot) from my past who I haven't seen in awhile and would like it KEPT that way! And out of all of them it was only a matter a time that some of them would actually have the gall to 'friend' me. I'd basically be a 'sitting-duck'! Not having the greatest guilty-conscious these days but still needing plenty of work in that department nonetheless, how the hell DO you 'politely' reject a friend-request on this site?? In many cases I certainly WOULDN'T be 'the bad guy' for doing so but why not AVOID being put in such a position ahead of time? Each of the few friends I had on the site at the time of departure were indeed real friends (well, there was one who I never really got to formally meet, only ever really saw her when she was practically a baby, but she did 'friend' me first and she certainly IS cute) but I guess it would have seemed like me and these friends being the Green Zone in Iraq only to every now and then get hit by a scud missile - that SCUD being the friend-request by 'douchebag of Christmas past'.

This site certainly has a way of bringing back past insecurities as well as ego from when you were a teenager or any other phases(s) of your past. Be it me getting a bit giddy when that cute girl mentioned in previous paragraph 'friended me first' or being a bit hurt when some of those whom I myself friended didn't respond. I was only on the damn site for 48 hours, maybe they didn't get my message because they just didn't check their email nor were on the site in that time!' (my point exactly!)

Yes, I think that just about covers why I abruptly 'left the herd'. The appointment with my councelor the next day you would NEVER GUESS what I spoke of 45 out of the 60 minutes I was there. Definitely a surreal experience. Cell phones didn't shock me when they came out, the internet itself didn't shock me when it came out either, but FACEBOOK? Man, I am STILL in future-shock over this one. I would certainly HOPE that the future as to how we interact with one another isn't through this or such a site like this. I got ENOUGH holes in my social life offline to begin with! And now I'm supposed to 'make-up' for this via THIS SITE? No thanks. Heck, the anxiety/prostractination that prevented me from ever trying out, say, a dating-site has now all but dissolved. I think I WILL now go about using that as another means in meeting women. Thank you Facebook for making that seem a luxury now. Like Yahoo Instant-Messaging (which I do quite often with my sister already) a dating site now in my mind is considered a GOOD internet social device. There definitely are plenty of good, intelligent, otherwise outgoing people who are apart of Facebook and who don't overconsume themselves in it, but it's just not for my psyche/constitution. Was kind of like that 'Get A Life' episode when Chris Elliot married Debra Shelton, had a full bodied marriage, then divored her all in a one day period. Only for me, it was a two-dayer.

All that said, I still kind of miss the site and still kind of wish I never erased my profile and left in the first place, lol. But it's kind of like leaving a party abruptly without saying goodbye to your friends making an insecure douchebag out of yourself - you're not going to return to the party, you're just going to keep on walking. And that's what I plan on doing with this site. Those real friends will still be there. FACEBOOK IS NOT LIFE! Or at least I HOPE it does not become that. Peace.

you wrote a lot glad to have left the heard
i guess you would like that 5 minutes of your life back?

it was a good read though
research islam if you are looking for something worthwhile
peace

I think the very concept of Facebook (and other social networking sites for that matter) revolves around wasting time! Let's face it, how personally rewarding and enriching is spending time on Facebook?! I just asked myself the other day, "what do I get out of it"?, and the answer was...surprise surprise...nothing!!! In fact, it makes me feel ***disconnected*** from people! I want Face-to-Face-Time, NOT Facebook! If I'm going to procrastinate, may as well do it in a way that will provide me with at least a little bit of pleasure! :-) I hope to delete my account soon.

Why is it that social sites are only mentioned as a waste of time nowadays? It could be said that the Internet and this blog is a waste of time as well. However, it's my choice and my time to waste. Sure I could be reading a book right now, but does it really matter how I choose to waste my time.. Also, If people do not care about other folks "status updates" then why do they care about them wasting time on Facebook?

I agree with KH that some folks are not "in the moment", but is that Facebook's fault? Maybe the topic should be "people with a Facebook addiction" vs. "Facebook is a waste of time"? There is alot of good in Facebook and MySpace. People should realize this.