With this blog title perhaps you were expecting some kind of great shopping advice. Actually, I was thinking of a way to have a better holiday experience regardless of your interest in and view of the end of year holiday season that doesn't involve shopping at all.
This time of year can be a time of ambivalence for many. For example, while we might value time with family and friends, not all of these relationships are what we'd like them to be. We can both love to be with and hate to be with our family and friends (or at least some family and some friends). Additionally, we also may be ambivalent about the whole holiday season to begin with. We might enjoy buying gifts for others yet also hate buying gifts too. Maybe we want to give gifts to some people but not to others. We might enjoy being out and about but also hate the stress associated with crowds as well. We may even be pretty ambivalent about holiday greetings. Do we say, "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holidays" and does it matter? And if you don't happen to be from the Christian tradition (even very loosely defined and secular in orientation) you might feel left out of all the activities.
Last weekend I had the privilege (and honor) to spend several hours with Huston Smith, the well-known scholar and writer of comparative religions, talking about the incarnation theme of Christmas. Many things he mentioned were of great interest and memorable (what a remarkable person and scholar) but one of his comments that really struck me was his belief that we all need celebrations regardless of our beliefs and traditions and especially at this time of year.
As we come to the end of the year and at least in the northern hemisphere, the very darkest time of the year, we all need hope and light. It is no accident that end of the year holidays such as Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, and New Years all have a "light in the darkness" theme at some level. Holiday decorations also focus on the light in the darkness theme as well. Lighting candles is very much part of the tradition for Christmas, Hanukkah, and Kwanzaa. Cities, towns, homes are so often full of festive lighting.
So when I reflect on how we can get more from the holidays from an ethical, spiritual, religious, and psychological perspective, I'd like to suggest that it would behoove you to ask yourself how you can be light in the darkness. I would bet that if you take the opportunity of the holidays to be light for others you'll get much much more from the holidays than you have in the past and that you'll relish and enjoy the holidays more.
What do I mean by being "light for others?" In a nutshell, during this season can you make a point to offer a kind word or gesture to others? Can you be a model of compassion, ethics, kindness, and graciousness? Can you try to ignore or develop distance from many of the silly distractions of the holidays like the whole shopping frenzy, the consumerism, family holiday politics, and the details (and often hard work) of the holiday season? If you can take a long, deep, and slow breath, close your eyes, get yourself centered, and ask yourself how you can be light in the darkness for others (including strangers by the way) I think you'll truly get the most from the season and provide hope (even in a small way) to others as well as for yourself. Regardless of what holidays you celebrate or how you celebrate them if you focus on being light in the darkness you'll likely be impressed and pleased with the results.
So, what do you think? How can you be light in the darkness during the darkest, coldest, and often challenging time of year?
