In recent blog posts I have offered some reflections on ways to do the right thing by living more ethically. In this post, I'd like to suggest that we ask ourselves three important questions each and every day. These include:
1. How do I want to be in the world?
2. Why do I want to be this way in the world?
3. What strategies must I use to remain true to my values and principles when I'm challenged or tested?
First, how do you want to be in the world? What are the principles or values that you hold near and dear to your heart and soul? Is it integrity, responsibility, concern for others, or what? Can you name several key principles or values that you think should be your mantra for living? I personally like the quote from the book of Micah (Chapter 6, verse 8) that guides me:
"And what does the Lord require of me? To love mercy, do justice, and walk humbly with God."
Thus, for me, we should aim to be compassionate, work for justice, and walk humbly (and never arrogantly) with God. Regardless of your religious tradition (or even if you don't have a religious tradition)... it sounds like a good way to live to me and something that I remind myself of daily: to focus on compassion, justice, and humility.
What principles or values make the most sense for you in your life? Write them down.
Second, why do you want to be this way in the world? Do you want to sleep well at night? Do you want to be a role model for your children? Do you want to live in a way that you need not be embarrassed or ashamed about your behavior? Do you want to live your life with a clear conscience? For me, these values are consistent with my ethical principles as well as my religious beliefs, practices, and tradition.
Why do you want to be a particular way in the world? Again, write it down.
Finally, what can you do to stay true to your values and principles even when tested? It is easy to say that you are ethical and think of yourself as a "good" person but what do you actually do when confronted with temptation? Do you say one thing and do another? To be successful in this regard you likely need to surround yourself with like minded people who share your values and principles for living and work hard to keep yourself away from problematic people or circumstances.
I gave a guest lecture in a business ethics class at a local college this past week and after my talk a student approached me privately with great distress in his face. He said, "I don't know what happened to me. I lost my way. I used to be such an ethical and moral person but somehow I've changed. Perhaps the people I hung out with was a factor and I stopped going to Church too. How can I find my way back again?"
No easy answers but I tried to supportively encourage him to get started with these three reflection questions and to get support from like minded people to do so. If he surrounds himself with people he can model and share similar values and ethical principles he'll likely gravitate towards better behavior (see social comparison and observational learning theory and research).
What ideas do you have to keep true to your values and principles? How do you maximize that you'll do the right thing when tempted to do otherwise?
What do you think? Can you do it?
