Cupid's Poisoned Arrow

Biology has plans for your love life.

by Marnia Robinson & Gary Wilson

Men: Does Frequent Ejaculation Cause a Hangover?

Scientists are discovering a neurochemical "hangover" after sexual satiety, which if overridden by more ejaculation, adversely affects mood and the ability to cope with stimulants. What might it might mean for those masturbating more frequently than they would have without Internet porn? Read More

Porn and DSM-5: Are Sexual Politics At Play?

The DSM-5 should move everything related to Internet addictions (gaming, cybersex, social media and pornography) to 'Substance Use and Addictive Disorders' and place it under the jurisdiction of addiction specialists who understand that Internet addiction is one condition—the product of plastic brain changes, and generally reversible. Read More

How Can We Bring the Problem of Porn Addiction into the Mainstream?

"Education requires people to listen. And it is a serious challenge to get people to listen to the somewhat novel and complex scientific argument for porn addiction....Any ideas for working around the obstacles and thrusting the problem of Internet porn addiction into mainstream conversation?" Read More

Women: Does Orgasm Give You a Hangover?

This month, German researchers revealed that sexual intercourse with orgasm induces a lingering cycle of prolactin surges in women. Is it coloring women's perceptions? Read More

The Other Porn Experiment

The widespread use of Internet porn use is one of the fastest-moving, most global experiments ever unconsciously conducted. But it's not the only groundbreaking porn experiment going on today. Read More

Recent Internet Addiction Studies Include Porn

All brain research done so far points in only one direction: Internet addiction is a real addiction—whether it involves porn, Facebook, gaming, or a combo. Estimates of addiction rates range from 8% to 21% percent in young people, and even higher in males. Read More

Santorum, Porn and Addiction Neuroscience

When you want to hear about the science relevant to Internet porn use, go to an addiction specialist. All Internet addictions have the power to alter brains, with negative consequences for children and adults. Read More

Guys Who Gave Up Porn: On Sex and Romance

"To go from being so numb, where only the most vile and shocking sexual images triggered a response in me, to getting such a positive sensation from a simple smile and meeting of the eyes ... that is what makes this whole process worth it." Read More

Why Do I Find Porn More Exciting Than A Partner?

"In the past I noticed beauty, but never FELT a DESIRE to be with a girl. I directed all my sex drive toward porn. I could never think about myself having real sex with a real girl. Now, I feel like sex is the most natural thing to do. 'Hell yeah it's possible for me to have sex. Hell yeah there's a lot of girls out there wanting to have it with me!' It's awesome!" Read More

Wiring Sexual Tastes to Hairless Genitals...Oops!

Straight men once typically wired their sexual attraction to adult females using the obvious visual cues of pubic hair and normal labia (among others). In today's porn world, however, "shaved," like anal sex, is de rigueur. Are we removing an evolved barrier that once discouraged adult sex with children? Read More

Let's Not Forget the Concepts of "Negligence" and "Harm"

Addiction brain science has come a long way. If David Ley were acknowledging the recent neuroscience of addiction, he would be taking into account the extensive empirical research on the brains of behavioral addicts showing physical, measurable changes, which are not present in control subjects. Read More

Exclusion of Internet Porn Addiction Makes No Biological Sense

The obvious question for Dr. Ley is this: If a self-identified Internet porn addict has all the signs, symptoms and behaviors common to all addiction, what possible brain changes are causing this collection of symptoms? Read More

The Wages of Sexual-Addiction Politics

In 1992, a political skirmish took place in the field of medicine, which has discouraged deeper understanding of human sexuality. According to David E. Smith MD, past president of the American Society of Addiction Medicine, doctors bartered away the recognition of sex addiction as a pathology in order to address a more immediate risk. Read More

Porn Addiction Is Not Sex Addiction--And Why It Matters

While porn addiction remains hidden under the umbrella of sex addiction, users who develop symptoms are in a precarious position. They have to figure things out for themselves. Read More

Will Orgasms Keep You in Love?

The more dependable the flow of oxytocin via daily affection, the easier it is to sustain a relationship. In contrast, a passionate one-night stand allows lovers' innate defensiveness to snap back into place pretty much as soon as oxytocin drops shortly after climax. Read More

Can You Trust Your Johnson?

The unrelenting stimulation of online erotica can desensitize a viewer’s brain, decreasing sexual responsiveness and making satisfaction more elusive. This is pushing many viewers toward content that was formerly not arousing, or even repulsed them. Read More

Why Shouldn’t Johnny Watch Porn If He Likes?

During adolescence our brains furiously wire up our sexuality to whatever arousing cues are around—and then prune away unused circuitry. Thereafter it’s not as easy to reconfigure our courtship and mating behaviors or unlearn unwanted sexual associations. Read More

Are You Hooked on Porn? Ask ASAM

With respect to porn, it’s not time spent viewing or what you’re looking at that determines whether your brain has changed. Instead, watch for these signs. Read More

Toss Your Textbooks: Docs Redefine Sexual Behavior Addictions

America’s top addiction experts have just released a new definition of addiction confirming that sex (and porn) addictions are genuine addictions. Read More

Porn Then and Now: Welcome to Brain Training

"Are we the first generation to masturbate left-handed?" asked a guy on www.reddit.com. Some guys would rather give up masturbation than Internet porn. Why? Read More

Porn, Novelty and the Coolidge Effect‏

The powerful effect of novel erotica on the brain cracks a genetic whip designed to override sexual satiety--regardless of collateral damage. Read More

Guys: Where Do You Fall on the Monogamy Spectrum?

Where are you on the pair-bonder spectrum? And what does it mean in terms of finding contentment? Read More

Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunction Is a Growing Problem

"Lots of guys, 20s or so, can't get it up anymore with a real girl, and they all relate having a serious porn/masturbation habit. When someone tells their story on a health forum, and there are 50-100 replies from other guys who struggle with the same thing, this is for real." Read More

Ominous News for Porn Users: Internet Addiction Atrophies Brains

Evidence of addiction processes is showing up in the brains of avid Internet gamers. Moreover, use of online erotica has greater potential for becoming compulsive than online gaming according to Dutch researchers. Read More

Exiting the Gene Pool Due to Low Sperm Count or ED?

Human sperm-count data suggests that, in contrast with our closest primate cousins, we are not built for prolific ejaculation. According to author Tim Birkhead, "The rate of human sperm production is lower than that of any other mammal so far investigated." Read More

Pair Bonding 101: Beware Novelty-As-Aphrodisiac

Much of today's sex advice won't work well for lovers who want to remain paired. It's based on the dopamine-cranking "novelty-as-aphrodisiac" strategy: trying a new sex toy, watching porn, swapping partners, acting out a kinky fantasy, engaging in daring or painful sex, and so forth. Novelty and fear are certainly arousing. Yet novelty-as-aphrodisiac has drawbacks. Read More

Vibrators and Other Pleasures: When 'Moderation' Fails

Can you use sex toys or Internet erotica in moderation? The answer lies in your brain—not in any external advice, wisdom or dogma. It depends on the state of your reward circuitry, your brain's ancient appetite mechanism. Read More

Day 64: Successful, Great, Normal Sex

"I guess I used to have preemptive ED. That is, I knew I would get ED, especially if I knew I'd need to use a condom, so I wouldn't even go for sex, well actually I wouldn't even pursue a girl. Two months ago, however, I did end up somehow in bed with a hot girl and no erection, which I found humiliating. That's when I found my way here." Read More

Life After Porn? "60 DAYS B*TCHES!"

"This has changed the way I interact with women in a big way. It's made it fun & exciting. I can't help it, I feel the sexual vibe rising up in me whenever there are beautiful women around. I feel like I flirt a lot more, without intending to. Awesome." Read More

DSM-5 Attempts to Sweep Porn Addiction Under the Rug

Unless the DSM reconsiders, if you fall into compulsive porn use, your condition "doesn't exist" and you will be treated, if at all, for the unpleasant symptoms of addiction (such as anxiety, ED, depression, concentration problems) instead of your actual pathology. It's the equivalent of giving you Vicodin for the pain of your leg fracture instead of setting it. Read More

Cupid's Poisoned Arrow Bloggers

Marnia Robinson is the author of Cupid's Poisoned Arrow: From Habit to Harmony in Sexual Relationships.

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Gary Wilson, an anatomy and physiology teacher interested in the neurochemistry of mating and bonding, is a co-author of Cupid's Poisoned Arrow: From Habit to Harmony in Sexual Relationships.

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About Cupid's Poisoned Arrow

The brain in love triggers neurochemical reactions for infatuation, lust and attachment. Too often, however, those phases are followed by boredom, irritability, heartache, the urge to self-medicate with drugs or alcohol--and attraction to new potential mates. Robinson's latest book, Cupid's Poisoned Arrow, zeroes in on this untold part of the story: how and why biology dissolves our romances, and what we can do about it. The part of the brain where we fall in love is also where we fall out of love. Learn the subconscious signals that make it easier to enjoy lasting harmony.