"For everything this disease has taken, something of greater value has been given"
Michael J. Fox
It's the alchemy of growth. A Native American saying is that your wound also has your cure. Being able to turn the toughest and most unimaginable situations into fuel for your journey is an extraordinary skill. It is one Michael J. Fox reveals and inspires in others. His latest book, Always Looking Up, shares his very personal journey and challenges as he fully fledges to being an incurable optimist.
Optimism: A choice
Listening to Michael J. Fox brought tears to my eyes. His perseverance, focus and heart are palpable. Fox spoke to Oprah last week and stated
"Now, I didn't have a choice about this, but I have a million other choices I can make today. I can choose where I go. I can choose how I feel about where I go ... If I make those choices well, I'm going to be a happy person"
Apparently, Fox had someone explain to him that your happiness grows in direct proportion to your acceptance. It clicked for him. It was only after accepting his situation and seeing all the other opportunities and possibilities that exist could he propel his best life.
The Secrets
Like Michael J. Fox, I also have a hard won optimistic attitude. I faced great losses and had to work like heck to "come back" into an optimistic state of mind. My travels took me to the Himalayas (like Michael) to reinvigorate my soul and see where happiness lived. I put in the work, as a friend of mine says.
So with that, I share some tips of how an optimist crafts his or her world:
· Alchemy - An unerring optimist seeks to turn challenges into fuel. There is recognition that optimism is the most helpful mindset to succeed. Churchill explained, "For myself I am an optimist - there seems not much use to be anything else." I believe this to be true. Optimism focuses you upon the positive and possibilities to create your best next step.
· Wholeness - The ability to see the light in the dark. Or as Debbie Ford states the "gold is in the dark" so to be able to see the rich, fruitful parts of our life often spring up from troubles and challenges is essential.
· Authenticity - To be able to fully embrace all of life honestly and openly. Being genuine in your experience is often humorous and keeps life lighthearted. It doesn't mean being optimistic 100% of the time. It means being real. This realness allows the negativity to exit uninterrupted.
· Mirrors - Optimistic people tend to hang around like-minded optimistic individuals. Like attracts like. Everyone, at some point, also needs help seeing the cup as ½ full.
· Greater - Many individuals who are optimistic believe in something greater (i.e. Divine, Nature, Spirit, Beauty, Art) that inspires them. Optimists also tend to habitually put themselves in places or experiences of inspiration (i.e. museums, concerts, great books, nature or whatever it may be). It is a choice.
· Focus - Optimists, more often than not, tend to view themselves as fortunate (despite their circumstances). For example, my father who suffered from FSHD, a debilitating muscular dystrophy, stated, "at least I don't have XYZ disease." What! This man was on oxygen, couldn't walk and needed help in the shower yet he still focused on the upside. He looked up.
And most importantly ...
Optimism is imprinted (at least partially!). Children first learn to view their lives via you, the adult. Michael J. Fox explained that "If I'm sitting watching TV or something, and my kids come and want to show me something or want to ask me something, I just made up my mind that there's nothing that I'm doing at any time that's more important than that." Such focused, heartfelt parenting is looking up.
© 2009
Reproduced only with permission by author.
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