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Crazy for Life

Escapades of a bipolar princess.

by Victoria Maxwell

Victoria Maxwell is a playwright, actor, and lecturer. See full bio

Crazy for Life

November 2, 2009

Practical Mindfulness: The New Witness Protection Program

Someone, a woman, with too much lipstick and over-plucked, penciled-in eyebrows squeaks and hiccups about the ‘greatest' buy shoppers could ever hope for. Something about a must-have ‘foundation garment' that vibrates away cellulite and stretch marks while you wear it. Oh gawd. I am watching... The Shopping Channel.

Then I notice that familiar feeling that's been sinking into my chest, dawning into my arms, and trailing into my legs. What I fear and respect most shows its edges: Depression.

But I've learned that doesn't mean I will spiral out of control, descend under its black sheet. If I gently albeit nervously invite the demons in for tea and watch them, the power they threaten to hold over me dissolves. Or at least lessens.

October 29, 2009

Top Ten Bipolar Blogs 2009 from PsychCentral

To be listed in the company of these well established, well written blogs, I am truly excited (not that bad, over the top, gonna run down the street naked kind of excited - but just your good ol' fashioned happy to be living kind of excited). It feels so good to be part of this very honest, very important growing virtual community.
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October 25, 2009

Does God Have a Place in Psychiatric Treatment Plans?

Unfortunately the one discharge plan element, which could have helped me accept treatment more readily, was overlooked. My spiritual beliefs were not only ignored, but more accurately actively avoided. Read More

October 13, 2009

Prt 6 - Mental Illness & Hypersexuality: A bad mix for a first date?

No matter how much you want to seduce someone, first dates and bikinis never, NEVER go together. On anti-psychotics and mood stabilizers, I am definitely not at my lightest weight. So: I play it safe – I wear a one piece. But one frickin’ SEXY one piece. High cut, low back, lower front – LOTS of cleavage. Not even remotely functional for swimming. But who said anything about swimming? Read More

October 11, 2009

Prt 5: Hypersexuality, Bipolar Disorder & Hospital Hook-ups: A match made in heaven or at least Playboy Channel

I am drinking a Corona, on fairly heavy anti-psychotics, carrying two plastic shopping bags and a huge cotton laundry sack, trudging down train tracks. I need both hands - so I guzzle the beer and toss the bottle. Logic, in this state of hypomania, is not my strong suit. So now I am tipsy, probably annoyingly giggly, carrying what feels like the weight of a small three year old under each arm. Read More

July 6, 2009

Goal Setting When Depressed Can Be Such A Downer

Does this sound familiar? I'll go to the gym four times a week starting tomorrow. Sure I will. I'll drive there, sit in my car, pound back an extra large Timmy Ho's ‘double-double' (that's Canada speak for coffee with 2 sugars and creams) while I wrestle with the elastic waistband of the new yoga pants I'm wearing. Who said anything about working out? Read More

June 5, 2009

(Prt 4) Beer, Meds & Men Don't Mix - Or Maybe They Do

When hurtling into mania our skills to determine degrees of recklessness and discern safety are at the best impaired, at worse vanished. The upside of this (sort of?) is our enhanced ability to enjoy said reckless and risky behaviour. This of course is the problem. Read More

May 21, 2009

Depression: No Laughing Matter - Or Is It?

I'm watching my favorite rerun of ‘Friends' - the one where Joey screams and scrams because Monica's dancing with a frozen turkey on her head. And I don't laugh. I always laugh when Monica has her head in a frozen turkey. Crap...I laugh if anyone has their head in a turkey. Or I thought I would.

My shrinking sense of humor is the canary in the coalmine - the alarm signaling clinical depression is slithering around me. I have to get right to work or risk... Read More

May 7, 2009

Dating in the Midst of Mental Illness (Part 3) – The Devil Made Me Do It

Weekend psych ward passes are supposed to be for going home or visiting friends in quiet, healthy, socially appropriate and psycho-social rehab sort of ways - not for partying, cutting loose, screwing up and messing around. But who cares? A sinful, ‘this-is-not-in-the-hospital-rule-book' feat could definitely be a confidence booster and a good way to show that freakin' head nurse who's really in charge. Or so I think. Read More

April 30, 2009

Dating in the Midst of Mental Illness (Sex, Love & the Psych Ward - Part 2)

There are slim pickin's on the psych ward. Not really much to choose from if you know what I mean. The only female choices are this jailbait Kleptomaniac and me on the ward. She's cute and all, spiral curls and tawny skin but way too young, even for him. Read More

Depression Basics

Some 15 million Americans struggle with depression—an illness that comes in many forms—from major depression and seasonal affective disorder, to dysthymia and bipolar disorder.

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