Coordination Games

ugh... this is what I was afraid of... :) But I guess it makes sense. I've seen a lot of people who might be called "unqualified successes" who make it big just because they're able to get people to like them.

It works more often in the third world. The thing that worries me is popular leaders don't always make the right choices. If you're working in a company that's filled with incompetent people, a competent person wouldn't really make it ahead all that much, because he would be unpopular. It explains why a lot of companies tend to remain mediocre, but you're right.

Likeable people do get more things done out of other people, and that's what matters in the end.

ugh... this is what I was afraid of... :) But I guess it makes sense. I've seen a lot of people who might be called "unqualified successes" who make it big just because they're able to get people to like them.

It works more often in the third world. The thing that worries me is popular leaders don't always make the right choices. If you're working in a company that's filled with incompetent people, a competent person wouldn't really make it ahead all that much, because he would be unpopular. It explains why a lot of companies tend to remain mediocre, but you're right.

Likeable people do get more things done out of other people, and that's what matters in the end.

ugh... this is what I was afraid of... :) But I guess it makes sense. I've seen a lot of people who might be called "unqualified successes" who make it big just because they're able to get people to like them.

It works more often in the third world. The thing that worries me is popular leaders don't always make the right choices. If you're working in a company that's filled with incompetent people, a competent person wouldn't really make it ahead all that much, because he would be unpopular. It explains why a lot of companies tend to remain mediocre, but you're right.

Likeable people do get more things done out of other people, and that's what matters in the end.

Very interesting article, yet my personal opinion about Ackerman’s views is that they are somewhat trite in that they intimate the kind of social order one finds in middle-school or high-school-aged kids. More to the point, I feel what the author suggests is ingratiating behavior. He is probably right that using the ‘mimicry’ technique works well, yet I would expect such behavior from a used car salesman, or a carnival seller of snake-oil; not from a professional co-worker, supervisor, or executive.

The facts are that not every single person with whom we come into contact is going to like us. This does not mean we cannot get along with those who decide they don’t like us; nor do we have to engage in any sort of mission to get 100% of people to like us 100% of the time. It is futile to try.

Open communication, and providing a platform for it is far more productive. When people feel they have a voice, even if they don’t agree with you or like you, the playing field eventually smoothes out for everyone. We all need to be heard and to be given an opportunity to speak; many deals are successfully made and carried out through mutual respect, rather than feeding people the best of one’s charming personality. The problems of emotional immaturity and bullying in schools and in the workplace will never be solved through a campaign of ‘liking.’

Remember that this is the manner in which all politicians grapple with each other for the same office – dirt, mud-slinging, and lies ensue, do they not? In fact, a focus on ‘liking’ will indeed reinforce the concept of ‘lack of civility’ in our nation; what we need to do is fight those who accept incivility with everything we’ve got. Our best weapon is communication.

Half of our country claims to have ‘liked’ George W. Bush, as Ackerman so nonchalantly stated. For me, Dubya held no credibility nor could I even say that I respected him. I did not, and my opinion has not changed. I still feel relief that he is out of office for good.

In summary, we have to learn to get along with one another regardless of whether or not we have little in common, regardless of whether or not we agree on an issue, or whether or not we feel we ‘like’ someone. We should be focusing more on giving everyone a voice, then coming to a compromise where no one gets kicked to the curb. Difficult? Yes, it is. Worth it? I believe it will be. If we wish to live with social stability, we have got to commit to mutual respect and open communication; not with who we think we like, or who actually likes us.

Very interesting article, yet my personal opinion about Ackerman’s views is that they are somewhat trite in that they intimate the kind of social order one finds in middle-school or high-school-aged kids. More to the point, I feel what the author suggests is ingratiating behavior. He is probably right that using the ‘mimicry’ technique works well, yet I would expect such behavior from a used car salesman, or a carnival seller of snake-oil; not from a professional co-worker, supervisor, or executive.

The facts are that not every single person with whom we come into contact is going to like us. This does not mean we cannot get along with those who decide they don’t like us; nor do we have to engage in any sort of mission to get 100% of people to like us 100% of the time. It is futile to try.

Open communication, and providing a platform for it is far more productive. When people feel they have a voice, even if they don’t agree with you or like you, the playing field eventually smoothes out for everyone. We all need to be heard and to be given an opportunity to speak; many deals are successfully made and carried out through mutual respect, rather than feeding people the best of one’s charming personality. The problems of emotional immaturity and bullying in schools and in the workplace will never be solved through a campaign of ‘liking.’

Remember that this is the manner in which all politicians grapple with each other for the same office – dirt, mud-slinging, and lies ensue, do they not? In fact, a focus on ‘liking’ will indeed reinforce the concept of ‘lack of civility’ in our nation; what we need to do is fight those who accept incivility with everything we’ve got. Our best weapon is communication.

Half of our country claims to have ‘liked’ George W. Bush, as Ackerman so nonchalantly stated. For me, Dubya held no credibility nor could I even say that I respected him. I did not, and my opinion has not changed. I still feel relief that he is out of office for good.

In summary, we have to learn to get along with one another regardless of whether or not we have little in common, regardless of whether or not we agree on an issue, or whether or not we feel we ‘like’ someone. We should be focusing more on giving everyone a voice, then coming to a compromise where no one gets kicked to the curb. Difficult? Yes, it is. Worth it? I believe it will be. If we wish to live with social stability, we have got to commit to mutual respect and open communication; not with who we think we like, or who actually likes us.