Airlines offer refuge from noisy kids. Read More
I 100% agree that airlines should crack down on families whose kids run wild, yell, scream, throw, kick, etc. It should not be tolerated, period. I also agree that any flight, whether for business or pleasure, should be free of conflict that at best ruins any chance of relaxation and at worst makes an individual with anxiety grab for an extra bar of Xanax. I'm not even going to mention the breast feeding issue because it doesn't bother me but I also agree that a little bit of modesty would be appropriate on an airplane.
However, to stereotype (yes, that is exactly what Ellen is doing here) an entire group of human beings and discriminate against them based on age is morally wrong. I'm a pretty frequent flyer, and sure, I've seen my fair share of children who should either not be flying or whose parents don't understand how to discipline. But well over 90% of the children I've ever flown with or next to mind their own business and are as quiet or quieter than most adults. In fact, I have had much more of a problem with intoxicated adults (usually adult white males if we're into categorizing people on this blog!). Next in line would be the "just plain rude" adults who act as though they're completely unaware of anyone else flying on the plane. These are they types who swear, spill food, kick your chair (it's a little more startling when it isn't an 8 year old kicking your chair but a 40 year old), get belligerent with the flight attendants (not to be confused with the intoxicated group).
So at the end of the day, this is yet another post on the "Complete Without Kids" blog that instead of exploring how to lead a full life without children, sounds more like whining and sour grapes from someone who doesn't understand kids or frankly, is flat out angrily jealous of those with kids. This is coming from a liberal who actually enjoys watching FOX News to challenge my beliefs. So please don't assume I'm simply one of those awful "parent things" contributing to the continuation of the human species.
Once again, it's nice to see such brilliant commentary from Ellen.
Nope, not hatred of children in this article. None at all. Anyone who imagines that Ellen is a pathological child hater shuld read this piece, and see just how wrong he is!
Anyone who thinks the "child-free" are misanthropic, selfish jerks will be completely set straight if he just reads this piece.
It's not just the children, it's the parents as well. I was once on plane and found seated with two well-behaved children. The children's mother was another matter entirely. She was not seated with us, but thought it was okay to yell across the airplane instructions to these children. She screamed (at the top of her lungs) at them when it was okay to chew food, and when they needed to stop chewing food, when to drink and when not to drink. I've never seen anything like it. It was so awful that other passengers recognized my dilemma and urged me to change seats without permission from the flight attendants, which I did.
I also despise drunk passengers, I have no clue why flight attendants insist on selling them more booze when they already can't sit up.
Correct me if I'm wrong but your life, all your friends lives, and the life of the future of humanity rely on people having babies. You could say our top priority as a race of beings is to reproduce so we last into the future. It's, what can we call it, hmmm...., its a drive! It's the sex drive!
So, as you have indicated you don't like babies on planes, and I wouldn't like it either if a kid was running up and down the aisles, however I fly a lot and I have never seen a problem with children and I think what you are is hyper sensitive and what you do is generalize using anecdotal evidence to try and force feed your opinions down readers throats masquerading as facts. I've seen lots of adults who throw fits though. And by the way, people who travel with babies don't appreciate the condescending stares from arrogant snobs like you seem to be. The travel is usually unavoidable because it's no fun to take a child on an airplane for any length of time. And as for your relaxation exercises, please lady, I'm over six feet tall so I have no sympathy if you are unable to do a downward facing dog in the aisle. I can barely move my legs at the end of a long flight,
Speaking of Alaska Airlines, they're going to shut your exercises down if you try them, I am an Alaskan and our airline would think more than a few times before they approached an Alaskan to tell them to cover a breast during feeding or to hush a child because you were irritated. More than likely they'd offer to rent you a divi-player and if that didn't work tell you to shut your mouth and enjoy the rest of the flight.
More on the breast feeding, how evil do you want to sound to people? I don't think women have started just flinging breasts out and waving them all around to feed the baby. It's always done modestly and you know that to be true. I'm sure the isolated case is what haunts you, boobs and milk scare you to no end. Why?
So I think you are a mean person trying to shove your irritations down into a real topic and what a small thing to base your life on. You are yuck.
Not only is this the last time I read a post by Ellen, but I'm going to take it a step further: Psychology Today owes its readers some level of quality control. I'm not talking about censoring ideas that I don't agree wtih. I read plenty of pro- vs. anti-medical marijuana articles on this site, and I have extremely strong opinions on that subject. I enjoy reading both sides, even when the arguments on one side sometimes get my blood pressure going.
The problem with Ellen's posts, in general, is that they have no real logic or concrete facts to support the ideas that are written about. This article is a perfect example of Ellen using Psychology Today as a sounding board for her hatred of kids (also hatred for the human race... hatred for herself perhaps... if one were to employ old school psychoanalysis).
Ellen - You are literally the only blogger on this website who routinely comes across as a petulant child (sorry if that is offensive to you, I know how much you hate kids). You wrote an article about how you feel like you are entitled to have your vacation start the minute you step on a plane. Nevermind all of the humans in the world who have needs and wants... it is all about YOU. Joe in San Francisco shouldn't be able to bring his daughter to see her grandparents in Boston because someone like you might have to wait an extra five hours to have his vacation officially start. Maybe you missed this in one of your undergraduate courses, but children don't have the abilty to fully control their emotions. This is NATURAL, unlike your utopian world without children.
For every post Ellen Walker writes, there are 20 written by mommy bloggers who wax poetically how they adore their children, adore helping their aged parents, adore their husbands and love give give giving. These writers never cite a study, a paper or any data that support any of their claims that mommies are all goodness.
If Psychology Today eliminates Ellen Walker and her point of view, then the site will have to say goodbye to hundreds of others that do the exact same thing.
A child free plane would be wonderful! Coming home from Canada last year our plane nearly didn't take off because of a 3 year old brat who refused to put on his seat belt and kept crying "LET ME OFF!" His lazy parents refused to do more than say "shh" when they should've put him across their knees after the third time. (Three strikes, you're out. Time for five firm squats to the bottom. Last resort, of course, and no more than five unless the child is older and can handle ten.)
Welcome! I didn't know Neanderthals still lived on Earth, let alone read Psychology Today!
Your answer is to spank a three year old soul who is terrified of a plane.... and we wonder why our society is filled with mass murderers. It is because people with your attitudes are raising children.
The trains where I live offer a quiet car on which people are supposed to refrain from conversation. It's great for someone who wants to sleep or just have a peaceful trip.
Why does Ellen need to single out children as the people who ruin her vacation? Children can be loud and obnoxious. So can adults. I've seen adults yell and curse, play loud music, get in fights, and do plenty of other offensive things. Wouldn't it be more fair, and actually more effective, to reserve a section where everyone is required to be quiet and polite, instead of discriminating based on age? Unless maybe you just hate children regardless of how they act.
Wow such hatery here from parent/child apologists! I'm surprised no one has played the "you were a child once" card.
Ask anyone what they dread most when taking a flight. It's not terrorism or the plane crashing. It's being sat next to a child. And whereas the first two scenarios are extremely remote, the third one is very likely, especially in these days of cheap plane fares and mass air travel, and the fashion for bringing children absolutely EVERYWHERE (like posh romantic restaurants or R-rated movies).
Ellen hasn't touched on two of the other gripes with children in planes - parents who change dirty diapers in their seats rather than in the toilets, and some airlines assuming all men are pedophiles so not seating any unaccompanied children next to them; resulting in them being sat next to WOMEN instead. Oh joy. Because we all love children, and no women are pedophiles.
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Ellen Walker, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist and the author of Complete Without Kids: An Insider's Guide to Childfree Living By Choice Or By Chance.
When and how should we open up to loved ones?