Many women lack the skill in negotiation that men often possess, and this interferes with their ability to earn the highest possible salary. There is also evidence that a man with children will earn more than a woman with children. The explanation here is that mothers are perceived as less likely to be committed to their jobs and also less competent.  On the other hand, the personal qualities of a good father are not deemed incompatible with the qualities of a good worker.

Discrimination Really Exists!

A close friend recently went through a hiring/interview process for a receptionist, and she told me that, while she had mostly female applicants, she chose to not interview any males because of a belief that they wouldn't stick with the job for long.  She decided to rule out two women, one who mentioned that she had young children at home and another who was a newlywed and lived in a conservative, family-oriented community. She ended up selecting a middle-aged woman whose children were grown and out of the house, and this pick proved to be a winner!

Was my friend discriminatory in her hiring process? Perhaps, but the reality is that she had to have a dependable receptionist who would be there every single morning when the doors opened, rested and eager to meet the clients as they walked through the front door-and she didn't have confidence that a mother of children still at home or a woman who was likely to be starting her own family soon would be able to consistently meet that need, because the kids would have to come first. 

Why Mothers Have Trouble Moving Up the Ladder?

Women have complained for years about the glass ceiling. They work hard to earn degrees and to have a skill set equal to that of any man, but then they find themselves passed over for higher-level positions.  A recent Wall Street Journal article written by Virginia Postrel looked at this phenomenon. She brought forth some very interesting numbers that revealed the following-women are choosing jobs that are family-friendly and avoiding jobs with long hours and greater career-advancement possibilities. The study she cited looked at MBA's a decade after graduation. These women were also working 24% fewer hours per week than men. Childfree women, on the other hand, work about 3% fewer hours than men.

I had a conversation recently with a male client who complained that his female supervisor was constantly leaving the office early to go to her son's soccer practice, and that at times she held conference calls from her car with her children in the backseat. He felt resentment that she was not fully committed to the job and that she was distracted by her parenting responsibilities, but she still was his superior!!

Are There Reasons for Choosing a Childfree Woman Over a Mom?

So, if you were an employer hiring a young person for an upwardly mobile career position, would you, based on the above facts, choose a woman or a man? It's tough for a potential employer, because it's illegal to ask a woman what her current parenting status is or what her plans are for the future related to becoming a parent.

What Should Women Do?

Women have tough choices to make. We simply cannot do it all-that's a fact of life! Women who decide to focus on parenting rather than building a career will likely not be as successful in their career aspirations, simply due to trying to juggle so many responsibilities. Even after the children leave home, they may find it impossible to catch up. Women who focus on career rather than becoming mothers are also making a sacrifice, but the reward for them may end up being success in their jobs on par with that of their male counterparts. As a society, it's time that we starting separating facts from fiction, and therefore gaining a better understanding of differences in individual situations.